Your thigh gap’s not good enough FYI
So I’m looking through comments on instagram just to see what questions you guys have and what I can answer. Then I come across this full on conversation about my thigh gap.
“Why is your gap curvy? I want a straight gap.”
“No offense but your gap is weird, it has waves.”
PART 1: WHEN PHYSICAL BEAUTY DEFINES HAPPINESS…
MAN! Really guys? I never even noticed. I’m not in the slightest way offended or hurt (so don’t worry about me – I love my legs) but I am concerned about where our heads are in terms of what beauty means. From time to time, I like to remind you guys about loving your body for what it is every step of the way on your fitness journey, whether you’re looking lose weight, gain weight, or get stronger. A reminder that everything you work for isn’t just for vanity, that only lasts so long. I’m starting to think some people just don’t get it…or don’t want to get it. Look, I’m not gonna be blind because as a certified fitness instructor for over 7 years, I understand that looking good is a big part of fitness industry. I mean, that’s why most people start working out, but where does it stop – when can you finally accept that you’re beautiful and that I’m beautiful?
I know some girls are thinking that once they achieve those pancake flat abs, lose the muffintop, and sculpt the widest gap ever in the history of gaps, then they’ll be happy. Right? But who’s going to guarantee that? Do you think you can go on hating your body until the number between your toes has reached a certain “acceptable” benchmark ? Do you think that when this happens, OMG, all of a sudden life is going to be amazing and you’re going to be the happiest, most successful person ever?
Listen up. Happiness is not a destination. It is an enlightened state of BEING. Some people think that happiness means having lots of money, looking flawless, and being famous. It’s not true. Happiness is living your life with passion and purpose and being peaceful with yourself. To me, true success is being able to reach this state of selfless, honest, raw happiness that isn’t defined by “things.”
I want you to take a moment and disconnect the fact that a physical attribute can bring you true happiness. You’re worth more than the distance between your thighs.
PART 2: NEGATIVITY IN THE COMMUNITY
Now, second part since I’m feeling fiery. I’ve noticed that over the past month, the tone in the Blogilates community hasn’t been as bright, happy, and vibrant as normal. You guys overall, are still amazing, but there’s a slightly different tone. I don’t know what happened. Usually, you guys are really good about helping one another out and being super appreciative. But I’m starting to see negativity. I’m starting to see people feeling entitled and some with no sense of respect for one another.
When working on the 12 Week #Newbodymakeover meal plan with the registered dieticians of WeightTraining.com, I was really pressed for time between creating the graphics for the meal plan PDFs, shipping out journals, filming the Hunger Games workout and working on other secret projects for you. I’m not trying to get credit for how hard I work, but I do want you to understand that when I get comments saying “You promised the meal plan today and it’s not even out. You can’t keep promises,” it really hurts me. Yeah, talk about my body all you want, but when you start attacking my integrity for serving you guys – I, I just don’t even know what to say. A FREE meal plan that most people are charging hundreds of dollars for that’s probably not even written by a registered dietician who has to have a 4 year bachelor’s degree plus an extra 1-2 years of training – and you’re telling me that it’s “so annoying” to have to wait for the password and that you’re just going to leave the community for someone better now because I can’t keep my word.
Oh. My Gawd.
Is it because the community has grown immensely?
I’m not even going to get started on how people have begun to complain about how much work it is to give a twitter follow or like a fan page for a whole 7 days worth of 40 meals. Being called “gluttonous” for this is appalling. Oh yeah, and then saying that “Cassey’s changed. I’m going to go find another trainer who gives free workouts,” in regards to my exclusive video in the app – hmm ok – cuz to my knowledge I’m still releasing full length workouts every Monday on YouTube as I have over the past 3 years. Again, many trainers put such videos behind a paywall in which you need to pay anywhere from $9.99 to $59.99 or more a month just to access it.
I’m not asking for you to bow down and give me your first child guys. I just want you to know that I do these things for you when most people charge because you deserve it. But as a human being myself, I’m affected when my genuine hard work to serve you guys is not met with some sense of gratitude. Negativity encourages me to want to stop.
I didn’t want this to become a complain-fest, but I do want to say that if you don’t appreciate being a part of the Blogilates community, don’t bring your negativity here. I’m protecting the sweet, happy, and fun personality that most of us embody. I want to feel comfortable when I come here and I want our POPsters to feel welcome sharing personal stories. We are friends and supporters of one another – not anonymous internet voices bringing each other down.
Alrighty…for the most part, I think I’m preaching to the choir but I just wanted to let you guys know I don’t tolerate any sense of making other people feel bad in our community. So if you see this sort of activity either here, on facebook, the app etc., please feel free to email me directly.
I love you all. Stay happy, stay positive, and know that I think you’re really beautiful 🙂
PS – Hope no one felt like I was scolding them! I wasn’t. Was just being firm…you should see me try to debate in real life. I just start smiling awkwardly xoxo