April 1, 2017|
What happens when I buy a waist trainer…
How many of you woke up today, opened your POPFLEX email, and saw this sitting in your inbox?
“The Slenderizer! Our newly patented product that can take the fat from your hips and belly and redistribute it right into your breasts using our secret suction cup technology- increasing your bra size by up to 4 cup sizes instantly! Solar powered! Available at TheSlenderizer.com“
I mean…look what it did for me!
Ummmm…totally JUST. KIDDING.
Not that I really needed to say that given that it’s April Fool’s Day and most of you got it right away in the comments section! But umm, emphasis on the “most of you” 😛
Oh man I had such a blast reading your comments. You guys cracked me up.
I’m SO sorry if I brought you guys through an emotional roller coaster of being confused, enraged, upset, hopeless, but then hopefully…enlightened and eventually, giggly! I saw so many messages from people saying that they were gonna unfollow and unsubscribe until they read the comments section. Phew!
So obviously today’s prank was more than just an April Fool’s joke, it is a lesson. I think you guys all know how much I despise waist trainers and any product that promises dramatic results with no work. Science just doesn’t work like that.
But what DOES work on people is the facade of creating hope…especially on women who are sick and tired of dieting and exercising. I get it, losing weight sucks and everyone wishes it was easier. So when someone comes along with a little credibility, banging body and they are endorsing something like a waist trainer (you know who I am talking about)…so many will blindly jump on board! IT’S SO SAD!!! But it becomes EMOTIONAL marketing.
Now, I don’t want that image you saw of me on IG to stick in your head. Erase it! The pic of me is not real and I do not look like that! THIS is what I actually look like on the left:
It’s called Photoshop y’all. My waist CANNOT go in that much!
My real boobs are on the left! As you can see – not too much going on for me 🙂
Be wary of what you see in informercials, in advertisements, and on Instagram. I encourage you to DO YOUR RESEARCH before you believe what people say. Ask questions. Be investigative. It will make you smarter and sharper.
As for The Slenderizer – it’s just a sketchy waist trainer I bought off of some sketchy website. Then Lexi sewed on the cabernet fabric to match my cabernet heart strings bra. We hooked a USB phone cord into an iPhone and I created that graphic which you can see serves as our App. We also cut a bubblegum colored bathmat and placed it inside the waist trainer and called that our “patented suction cup technology.”
Oh and how does it feel?! OMG. SOOOOOO TIGHT!!!! I put it on (it has a million little hooks) and felt like Scarlet O’Hara from Gone with the Wind in that one scene with the corset. It took several minutes to get it on the first time. It did push me in a lot in my waist and hips area which left me kind of stunned when I looked in the mirror. I thought it was funny so I tried to eat dinner and do crunches in it for the sake of experience, and umm, NO. Just no.
If for some reason you want to feel like a useless vacuum sealed piece of meat, I guess go for it, but there is NO WAY that a waist trainer will help you actually lose fat. It changes your shape for the moment that you are wearing it. It also makes it really hard to breath properly. Once you take it off though, everything will fall back into place.
So what’s the point?
You guys KNOW what you need to do to if you want to change the shape of your body and lose fat. It’s called exercising and it’s called eating clean. But those 2 things do SO MUCH MORE than make you look good. They will make you FEEL good, they will give you STRENGTH, they will give you CONFIDENCE, and you’ll also get to LOOK YOUNGER and LIVE LONGER.
Ask yourself what you would rather have. I think the choice is clear here.
Hope you guys are having a good start to your April and didn’t get fooled TOO HARD.