If social media is toxic for you…do these 4 things.
If social media is toxic for you…do these 4 things.
Hey guys!
Today we are talking about something that I’m sure all of you are very familiar with…SOCIAL MEDIA.
Without it, there wouldn’t even be Blogilates! YouTube, Instagram, Facebook and Twitter are the ways I am able to share with you my workouts, healthy meals and everything in between. Because of it, we’ve been able to create a loving and supportive community worldwide!
I am forever grateful for it…but…sometimes social media can be harmful to you. Especially when you start using it to compare yourself to others instead of using it as MOTIVATION.
You know what I mean…
Do you ever find yourself scrolling through Instagram endlessly looking at pictures of other people, maybe even other POPsters, friends or complete strangers, and you start comparing yourself to them? Since social media is highly visual, we tend to look at other people and compare our bodies to them. Then the thoughts start to run wild…
Why am I not skinny like her?
She has nicer abs than me.
She’s prettier than me.
She has it all together.
Why isn’t my life as good as hers?
See how toxic it can be? I’m guilty of it too. Sometimes I’ll find myself seeing pictures of other people and start to question my own body and worth. But that’s wrong. Like I always tell you, comparison is the thief of joy.
I am going to share with you some quick and simple tips that will help you stop scrolling through IG every morning wishing you looked like someone else, and instead USING social media as a positive motivational tool.
Tip #1 – Unfollow or unfriend people who instantly make you feel bad about yourself.
If you look at at account and you instantly get a negative feeling – whether it be comparison, jealousy or whatever. Then know that it’s OKAY to completely unfollow someone. The people you follow should be people who inspire and motivate you to reach your goals and be a better person. You don’t want toxic people in your real every day life, so they shouldn’t be on your social media either.
Tip #2 – Know the difference between social media and real life.
Pictures can be photoshopped and changed. We can take pics at different angles with certain lighting to make ourselves look leaner, or have a bigger booty, or nicer abs. Know that a picture is just a picture. It is not always reality. Also, people tend to “play themselves up” on social media. What I mean by that is we tend to only highlight the GOOD moments in life instead of showing weaknesses or struggles. It may seem like someone’s life is all together, but it may not be 100% realistic. So be smart about what you see and don’t let it get to you – it may not be true.
Tip #3 – Accept that we are all different.
When you look at someone’s profile and you see their fitness journey – know that their body and their life is DIFFERENT than yours. We aren’t all the same. So, it’s not realistic to even start comparing ourselves to others. Instead, use their journey and progress as MOTIVATION for you to start living healthier and working harder.
Tip #4 – Know when to put the phone down and live.
Social media is a huge part of my business. Like I said before, without it, there wouldn’t even be Blogilates! But we need to learn when it’s time to put the phone down and start to live in the moment. That is when you will truly start to live and do things for yourself, not for others. That is when you will stop comparing yourself to strangers on the Internet and start LOVING yourself and your body because YOU are amazing. Even I have to take the time to turn off and just relax. Honestly, social media can be stressful and it shouldn’t be!
Social media is an amazing outlet that allows us connect and create friendships worldwide. It can be used as motivation and inspiration. But when you find yourself getting down and jealous of other people, it’s time to take a moment and step back. Either unfollow them, or figure out WHY their one simple post is making you feel that way. Is it because you’re insecure of yourself? You don’t feel good enough? Well YOU ARE. You are capable and you are strong. So I encourage you to be that positive, real role-model on Instagram, Facebook, etc. Be that person who is real and honest about their journey. It will push others to do the same. That’s why I encourage you to post about your PIIT28 journey. The success and happiness that you achieve will motivate others to achieve that too!
Do you find social media overall a positive and motivational, or degrading and harmful? Leave your thoughts below!
37 thoughts on “If social media is toxic for you…do these 4 things.”
There are Array37 comments posted by our users.
I always focus at the number of followers and when the number is low I always start doubting on myself like, you don’t know how to do things right, you’ll never achieve something in life
Excellent article.
“Do you find social media overall a positive and motivational, or degrading and harmful?” Yes. All of that. I think one of the challenges is that when we first got into social media, many of us, myself included, added and followed people and organisations without much consideration as to what would happen down the track. What all those little one here one there adds would add up to. How the cumulative affect could be so challenging.
What i find now is that a regular ‘stocktake’ is useful. So now I evaluate what pops up in my feed. Ist it positive, negative or somewhere in between. It doesn’t have to be something that makes me feel bad about myself, it can simply be noise that doesn’t add to my well being and it’s history. Unfollow. Unfriend. Goodbye Felicia. It’s about taking responsibility for what we let in to our lives… into our minds.
Asking if social media is good or bad is a bit like asking if FOOD is good or bad. There’s all sorts out there. It’s up to us to decide what we consume, and how it makes us feel. I’ve actually found it quite empowering hitting the little unlike, unfollow, unfriend button. (And if you’re too scared to hit the unfriend button in case it offends someone, unfollow works almost as well!) S x
Social media is indeed toxic. It makes you wanna think about things that doesnt really matter, one photo, one tweet, one post or stories regarding to some things that makes your worth descend to another level would completely ruin your entire day and you’ll be an ass for constamtly thinking about that single pos, so to avoid such, i have to completely undergo a social media detox and unplug myself from toxicity.
Wow that was really deep lately I’ve been having this struggle, even though I didn’t compare my body to other people but i was really thinking about other people’s success in their studies and work, so thank you endless times !!!
I love reading your posts they help me sort myself out and stay motivated thanks for everything xxx
I needed to hear this. Thank u ❤
Well stated Cassey! Let’s be truth to ourselves and enjoy our journey to be healthier and happier version of us! Ana
I needed this! Thank you! 🙂
Cassey you know your quote ” do more of what makes you happy and less of what doesnt”, i love working out but i hate revising for school but i guess i have to revise in the end but i still keep up my workout for everyday. thanks for the motivation
I need this motivation <3 thank you cassey <3
I used to compare myself to other girls, and it was sad and made me feel bad about myself all the time, thing why am I not like that, why don’t I have that , why am I not pretty like them, etc etc and it made me feel bad about my body and how my face looked. Just one day, I decided that I was not going to use FB anymore or even have an Insta account, I started following people who motivate me and make want my best version of myself on Tumblr (now I don’t use too much too), Youtube and blogs and so far its been helping me a lot, I don’t think that unfollowing people will help, but working on yourself, caring more and loving yourself, changing how you see yourself and the world, mostly accepting who you are works well and If needed instead of unfollowing deleting Insta account or suspending for a while.
I used to compare myself with other Girls on IG or FB, and that makes me very sad and toxic. At the begining of this Year I realised that this is very stupid. I totaly changed my thinking about myself and my life. Behind people like You Cassie and other girls that show us exercises there is a lot of hard work, many hours of compose workout and a lot of things that we can’t see. Everyone starts at something. If I don’t move my booty, nobody do this instead of me! I am the only one who can change my life. I should inspire of others not jelous! Now I’am looking for a new job, trying to inspire my friends, not comlaining about everything. Thank You for being my Inspirations! <3 I have fun with new challange, I know that I'm not perfect and my flat is tiny so it's hard to take picture, but still hard work and positive 😀 So Girls, heads's up, smile and stay strong! 🙂
Thanks for your inspiring message Cassey!!! You have answered my questions about my insecurities.
That’s why I love you
Thanks Cassey ?
I really needed this today. Thank you for everything that you do Cassey. You have changed my life❤❤
thank you so much Cassey, this made me very happy <3
I rearly get affected by the way other people look in their social media photos . But I DO compare my abilities… I like following other artists and they inspire me, but most often I think : “I’ll never be that good” or “I’m not talented enough” or “I’m making the wrong life choice by applying to study design”…….. ‘sigh’
I think the bottom line is being secure with yourself. Every day look for something you are grateful for about yourself or something else in your life. Write it down and act upon it. I see instagram as a place to share the positives of your life. It is kind of like journaling or blogging but through pictures. We should be happy for other people having fantastic lives and looking good. I am not going to unfollow someone because they are prettier than me but I will when they are posting toxic messages, pictures, being intolerant or gossiping. Unfollowing someone because they are prettier than me is the same thing as unfriending someone in real life because they are better looking than me or because they gain more attention. Accept who you are, be you. Also, it is important to be careful these days with what you post on social media, negative wise, due to future employment. When I see other POPsters post before and after photos I am absolutely inspired. What I have learned so far is that truthfully sometimes we have it together and sometimes we do not. Realistically, we are not going to pick the picture where we look like we rolled out of bed. We are going to pick a picture that looks nice. Just how we would dress cute, not for anyone else, but for ourselves because it feels amazing.
It is important not to seek gratification from others on social media but try to be an inspiration. If you believe that IG should be more than a perfect life- be the one to start the trend… post a no make up selfie or a dress down photo or a picture of a bad grade, etc. We must all learn to love how we were made. There is beauty in everyone. We all have weaknesses. I think we should all just be happy for one another! Cassey you are gorgeous and motivate so many women to feel and be their best! You do not paint an unrealistic picture of perfection, but a realistic painting of what our best self could be. Thank you!!
AR
What if some of them are your friends? Do i unfollow them too
Yes. It’s a hard thing to do, but I have. They won’t know unless you tell them… or they can’t find you. Your mental peace matters the most and if they ask why you unfollowed them, be honest. Some people aren’t good for you whether it’s their fault, your fault, both, or neither.
What I do is lock myself out from IG,Twitter, sometimes
Love this post! The last couple years I was in recovery from an eating disorder and one thing that really helped me stay positive was to completely abstain from social media sites and block anyone negative on my Facebook…as I got more secure in myself, my recovery, and my health, I started to get back into social media and only follow people who’s posts help me maintain my health, my positivity, and my happiness.
This was me like a few months ago! I stopped posting for a while, flushed out social media for a few months. Then now I’m back! 🙂
My Instagram is only for me to be inspired by or to inspire. I don’t go on my Facebook some days or check my email because I need a break from the things going on around me. But my Instagram, now that always brings me smiles.
This is such an important reminder. I struggle a lot with social media. So much so that I deleted my Facebook at the beginning of the year. It was just bringing me more negativity than anything else and I needed a refresher. I really went through and cleaned up my Instagram and Snapchat too, and that has helped a ton.
Thank you so much for this post, Cassey. I used to be very bothered by social media and allowed the comparison to affect my mood and confidence. In fact, I was so blinded by my friends’ perfect feeds on Instagram that I genuinely thought they led such perfect and carefree lives! I felt pathetic for myself back then. Gradually, I decided to deactivate my Instagram account because I was facing some life problems and I knew that social media would only add on to my vulnerable and miserable state. Right now I have reactivated my account and I no longer feel so suppressed by it anymore as I know how to stop comparing myself with others. I have learnt to treat social media as a tool for me to keep in touch with my friends, especially at my age when everyone takes up different paths, be it university or work. Also, confidence and self-esteem are directly related to how much one gets affected by social media. Be more confident, ladies! Your inner beauty matters more than just your appearance.
Two months ago, I actually decided to give up Facebook entirely, and it was the best decision I’ve made in a long time. I was irrationally comparing my life to several specific people, and even when I unfollowed them, I would still check their pages. It was like I couldn’t look away! Choosing to stay off Facebook means I don’t have to worry about whether or not I’m missing what they posted. I just don’t even have the option to look!
I spend far less time on my phone now, and am much more productive and engaged in the “now.”
I have to work at not taking social media so seriously (especially since I am a social media manager for my band!). Social media should be a fun and positive experience. It was created with that intention for us to meet and get to know people that share our passions and interests, but it is so much a way of life for many people, people can’t function without it, sadly.
I try really hard not to compare myself to others. Sometimes though it just gets the best of me! When I do start to get down on myself or start hearing negative thoughts in my head I try to remember #2 and #4. It’s so important to keep those in perspective!
I don’t compare myself to others but i do get disappointed when I don’t get as many likes as someone else on before and after pics. That upsets me for some reason and I know it shouldn’t but it does. I feel like my success is really a failure then.
Sometimes people are just jealous or so insecure that they feel like your success is their failure so they won’t like your picture… they want to see others do good but not better than them !
Are we on the same par/share the same brain, Cassey?! I recently ALSO spoke about this in my youtube:
http://thefitty.com/2017/02/17/the-problem-with-social-media/
What does that tell you right off the bat? That social media is selective. Meaning, do not be fooled by what you see! It by no means reveals what exactly a person is going through or feeling in their life. I personally use social media to document mostly the best of the best because I feel like those are the moments that need treasuring. I rarely can gather up the audacity to take a photo on days I’m sick. And who wants to snap of photo of themselves in the middle of an anxiety attack?
Like.
HoldOnAMinuteLetMeJustStopHyperventilatingForOneSecondTomakeSureITakeASelfie
#ButFirst…Letmetakeaselie?!
Also, being on social media sets an expectation to uphold a certain identity. Sometimes that great for accountability! But it can also be misconstrued that I’m this perfect, perfect being that never steps outside the box of that identity.