Exhausted. | Day 7 of 90

Hey guys,

It’s Sunday night and 10:48pm. Already failing my sleep schedule goals – more on that in this blog post. Ugh. Anyway, I am going to blog as quick as possible so I can go upstairs to prep for bed!

I cannot believe 1 full week has passed since my 90 day journey has started. I honestly feel like it’s going by too quick. 90 days or 12 weeks or 3 months – it’s the perfect amount of time to create significant change in most people’s physique. But the truth is, I am a little uncertain of what my results will look like. I have not lifted consistently like this for 10 years, and I’m scared I’m not going achieve what I am set out to do. I do not know how my body will react to the food I am eating and the workouts I am doing, and the truth is – I am afraid of failing. Muscle building is a much longer process than weight loss, so my fear is that once I figure out that something is “not working” I won’t have that much time left to fix it.

But then again…I am actually the one in charge of this journey, so I guess if I need more than 90 days, I DO have the power to grant myself the time 🙂

Anyway, let’s recap week 1 shall we?

Some outfits from my workouts this week! I TOTALLY forgot to shoot what I wore on Cardio Day (Wednesday) and the perfectionist in me is DYING. I must not forget for week 2! I need to have all 6 outfits or I will be really mad at myself.

Also, v happy that we came out with some POPFLEX mesh workout gloves last year because now I get to use them almost everyday in the gym!

My hands are so delicate and will get callouses really easily, so gloves are a necessity for me. Without gloves, I am not able to deadlift as heavy because the weight feels like it’s literally ripping my skin off.

This week’s workouts were so intense. Like, OMG. They destroyed my muscles. So much so, that by Day 6, I just could not do it anymore. I was EXHAUSTED. So, I listened to my body and took my Rest Day one day early. Good news is…this means I am truly lifting as heavy as I can handle, and I am very, very happy about that. There’s something so empowering about working out for the purpose of GAINING (muscle) instead of losing (weight).

Overall, the meal plan for week 1 was very good. I was STUFFED. Almost too stuffed. All the protein kept me full, in addition to all the fiber from the veggies I was eating.

Winning recipe of the week was a tweak I did to my protein pancakes. I added some tapioca powder to them and AHHHHHHHH they tasted like buttermilk homestyle pancakes! Like, for real!!! Fluffy, light, and does not taste like I used any protein powder. I am going to keep these protein pancakes on the menu for week 2.

Blogilates Homestyle Protein Pancakes

  • 2 scoops vegan protein powder
  • 1/3 c egg whites
  • 1 TBS tapioca powder
  • 1-2 TBS water
  • 1 tsp baking powder

90 Day Journal entries:

Week 1 was great workout wise and food wise, but it was a struggle sleep wise. I did not hit my 7-8 hour daily sleep goal 2 days of the week. There was one night I woke up in the middle of the night with too many ideas that I stayed up for an hour trying to sift through my thoughts. My mind is extremely active and never wants to rest. I started incorporating magnesium the back half of the week and I think it’s helping to relax me, so I will continue this.

The progress.

Unfortunately, I am not going to be getting a Dexa Scan every week, so I can’t track my body fat % and lean tissue mass. All I have to go by is my weight, which is the part that scares me. My weight went up this week by 2.4 lbs and I have no idea if it’s fat mass or muscle mass. I mean, it could also be water mass, food mass, or period mass because THAT just started on Friday!

So, earlier in this blog post when I said I was scared, it was because of this. I don’t have all the info I want at my fingertips and I am afraid I won’t be able to tweak effectively and efficiently. I was planning on getting a scan at day 30, day 60, and finally day 90. But what happens if on day 30 I find out my progress has been going in the wrong direction this whole time!? It would feel like such a waste of a month. So, I might want to consider getting scanned a bit more frequently so I can empower myself with more information.

Anyway, that is how week 1 went! Overall, really happy with my workout plan and will upload my new meal plan tomorrow. K, gotta go to bed now!

41 thoughts on “Exhausted. | Day 7 of 90”

There are 41 comments posted by our users.

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  1. Ashley says:

    I like your weight tracker sheets! Are you going to release a printable version or maybe include them in the next 90 Day Journal?

  2. Lorain says:

    Check out the FITINDEX scale on Amazon! It’s cheap, it syncs easily to your phone, and those who have had a dexa scan in the reviews say it is surprisingly comparable. I liked mine so I bought their measuring tape too.

  3. Bibis says:

    I feel like this is more of a “90 day journey to my bikini-competition body”, and not a “90 day journey to muscle”, or strength, or however you want to put it. Which is fine! Just be honest with yourself and your audience.

  4. Lynnette says:

    You got this 💪

  5. Vanessa Jane Wikel says:

    as someone that has tble building muscle I can say you will need to eat AT LEAST maintenance, and more carbs than you originally thought if you want size and to keep up your strength. carbs will give you the fuel you need. if i’m not lifting i lower my carbs bc otherwise i will get gasey and retain too much water. but durig lifting you need it.

  6. Ellie says:

    Go Cassey! I 100% get the anxiety of not having all of the info at your fingertips. But you can do it. I have no doubt that however this journey goes, something good will come out of it — maybe even better than you hoped for!

    1. Cassey says:

      Thank you!

  7. Monika Morawska says:

    I can understand that you like a challenge but I’m surprised you made it so hard and extreme. Why not 1. Give yourself more than 90 days 2. Give yourself more rest days (so that you recover properly and have more energy to work out at 100%). 3. Do 5-6 exercises a day instead of 8-9? I guess the idea of a challenge that is very hard is quite popular (75 hard for example) but there are more sustainable ways to achieve goals, that just take longer. So I’m guessing this is more about challenging yourself and seeing how far you can push instead of a long term change in goals?

    1. Nicole says:

      Agree that this is A LOT, especially if you’re not used to long weightlifting workouts. Hope it doesn’t lead to burnout or injury 🙁

    2. Cassey says:

      I’m definitely open to going past 90 days! Just depends on how I feel when I get there 🙂 Everything else is just a starting point based on yes challenging myself but also just knowing what I can typically handle. I’ve already made adjustments after paying attention to my body and how it feels, and will continue to do that!

  8. Serena says:

    Hi Cassey, good luck on your journey! Last year I took a DEXA Scan and the operator advised that these scans shouldn’t be done more than once a year because they could be harmful for the body. Not sure this is true though, what’s your opinion about this? I would also be interested in taking scans 3-4 times every year to keep the track of my muscle mass. Thank you!

  9. T says:

    My trainer has said that if you are trying to build muscle you need to do cardio AFTER lifting. And I’ve heard this numerous times from other sources as well. Is there a specific reason you are doing your cardio before?

  10. Sharon says:

    Love following along with this journey! Your concerns and fears are totally valid, but I think it’s so great that you’re pursuing this goal with that possibility in mind and are trying to adjust accordingly!

    1. Cassey says:

      Thank you!

  11. A says:

    Hey Cassey, could you maybe enlist the help of a personal trainer or someone who is used to building muscles? I know you have all the info at your disposal and you are wanting to do things your way, but it might be good to speak to someone who has done this when you are feeling in doubt or in fear and they can maybe give you pointers. Just my 2 cents. Very much enjoying following this journey!

  12. Kay says:

    Umm you’re going to gain weight when you’re eating and working out to build a lot of muscle. If you’re scared to gain weight then I don’t think you’re going to be happy with this journey. It’s not about the weight on the scale. I’m so confused. You will gain weight, probably both fat and muscle, on this journey. It’s literally a fact. 🤔

    1. sarah says:

      she is clearly not eating enough so she will rather lose weight

    2. Cassey says:

      Not scared of gaining weight! Just being open about things I’m experiencing and learning during the process.

  13. If it was going in the wrong direction,
    would you not still treat it like an experiment? You cannot fail an experiment….

    1. Cassey says:

      Good point!

  14. Camille says:

    Hey Cassey! So I am wondering if you have ever heard of the FitTrack scale? It’s a scale that measures your muscle mass, your fat mass & body fat % as well as a bunch of other stuff and it’s just a scale you put in your bathroom. It comes with an app that allows you to track you progress. Now of course it is not going to be as accurate as the Dexa Scan since it is just a scale but I have found this one in particular to be more accurate than other body fat% scales I have tried so if nothing else it would allow you to track progress because even if the numbers don’t match up to the Dexa results you can still see if body fat is going down while muscle mass is going up. Just a thought that might help you on this journey.

    1. Cassey says:

      Yes! I have something similar!

  15. Elizabeth says:

    Your fear of “wasting” a month by not getting the results you want after one month is a little worrying. Shouldn’t this experiment main goal is getting more muscles? You shouldn’t be afraid of not making the numerical progrss you want if you’re already increasing your dumbbell weights, that shows progress is being made which is the important thing! Also, there’s no way you gained 2.5 pounds of fat with the net calories you had (rough estimate with the exercises you did would make it ~1000-1100) so it’s definitely from your period. Please be kind to yourself and don’t rate your success on your weight, only the dumbbell weights.

  16. Jordan says:

    You got this Cassey! Im super stoked to see how you’ll come out of this!

    1. Cassey says:

      Thank you!

  17. Lorna says:

    You’re awesome Cassey for sharing your journey! What do you think about those at-home scales that calculate body fat %? They might not be as accurate but it could give you an idea! Also you taught me this, but focusing on how you feel/the changes in appearance rather than only numbers is important too! Also, seeing the changes in the weights that you lift will also be super cool to see and encouraging! You got this Cassey!

    1. Cassey says:

      Thank you! I have one of those scales at home and while they are helpful, like you said they’re often not quite as accurate!

  18. Samantha says:

    Cassey, this is a great update! Building muscle is such a different animal. I’m so glad you listened to your body and rested when you needed to. Those days are almost just as important as the lifting days – you’re healing and building muscle during this time! Through your journey if you feel like you need to add in more than the one rest day, definitely listen to yourself regardless of what you planned on paper. You can always adjust! Sleep is also important to recovery and muscle building, and I commend you for working towards improving your schedule. I know that’s a tough one. And don’t be discouraged by the scale – it’s just a data point! Often times when you lift and you end up being sore, inflammation builds up in the body which can affect the scale (and even the week before/during/after your period can add to this because “Gee, thanks Mother Nature…”). Also feel free to fact check me on that. I know that for me, the scale goes up after a lifting day, especially if I’m sore. Look for other methods of measurements like how many more reps or weights you can lift as you progress or even how your clothes fit. I would definitely focus on how much more you improve during your sessions vs the scale. Keep going, Cassey! And if you need more (or even less) than 90 days you do you! 🙂

    1. Cassey says:

      All great points!! Thank you!

  19. Rocio says:

    Hey Cassie!
    I’ll be done with my 90 Day Journey on February 1st and I’ve been using the Body+ Withings scale. It helps me fill out the muscle mass and body fat percentages! 👏🏽 It’s been great! Also tells me my water intake, steps I’ve taken, and the app is very informative on my body composition. I’ve linked the website, check it out! https://www.withings.com/us/en/scales

  20. Coralie Angulo says:

    I like to read your story and follow your journey it’s very inspiring to pursue in my own 😉

  21. Rena says:

    It is SUPER common to gain some water weight when you start a new lifting program. It’s just water retention as your muscles try to heal themselves. It may last for a couple of weeks before dropping off. Try not to be discouraged! You’re doing great!

  22. Ellie says:

    When you start lifting heavy you’re going to retain more water and this can take up to 6 weeks to balance itself out. You won’t be gaining fat, you’re literally eating at a slight deficit. Trust the process! And maybe talk to someone who coaches weight lifting for extra input! Also given that you were as tired as you were, you might need more food! Or more rest.

  23. Yen says:

    Super inspired by your first and now second journey! Try not to stress and like you’ve said enjoy the process. Muscle is hard to gain and it may take longer then you plan, but you’ll see some progress absolutely!! All that protein and weight lifting will get you in the right direction.

  24. Samantha says:

    I have a smart fitness scale and worth the corresponding app I can kinda keep track of my weight body fat percentage and muscle mass. Don’t know if this will help ease your concerns. On another note. You got this you are such an inspiration.

  25. Luna says:

    There’s no “wrong” way or “right” way so don’t stress too much about it! I know it’s hard (I mean, who doesn’t lol) but just trust your body to do what needs to be done! Obviously, it’s nice and all to have our brain and bodies working together, but at the end of the day, our bodies don’t really care about numbers or scales, or fat/muscle percentages. It just wants food, rest, sleep, the chance to be active, and do all the cellular things that it needs to do to keep us alive. So just do you and know that as long as you’re working to improve yourself, it’s enough!
    On a side note, I’m so happy that you’re taking this time for yourself! You’re a really big inspiration and I just want to say thank you for helping me so much! I found you at the start of quarantine and honestly Cassey, I think you’ve saved my life more than just once. You’re an amazing person and a wonderful inspiration! Thank you so much, and lots of love from Canada!

  26. Elizabeth says:

    That’s crazy to me that you gained weight when you were working off so many calories to the point of going under 1200 calories a day. That makes me think it could be period related. Next week will probably be more telling.

  27. Pauline says:

    Eh, what happens if it your body goes the “wrong” way? What if it’s the way your body needs to be?

    1. Line says:

      I won’t lie. I am a bit disturbed by this post. Weight gain is kind of the point when you want to build muscle. You eat more in order to have enough energy to lift heavier, and some if it WILL be fat – and that is okay and so so normal. This post feels reflects a deep fear of gaining weight, and I don’t think it’s the right journey to be on, if you are not comfortable with that thought. That being said with 1600 calories and such a rigid training schedule I doubt she has actually gained weight. I believe it’s a mix of water retention from sore muscles and fluctations from the period. I seriously hope Cassey will find a way to accept the muscle gaining process and stop being so hard on herself 🙈

  28. Eleonora says:

    Yay! You can do it Cassie! You’re so inspiring that I decided to join you on this 90 days journey and try doing the exact same workouts you are doing until my journal from Popflex arrives. And about the weight tracking I can totally relate, it can get addictive and scary so for now I’ll just focus on my body measurements. I’m not as strong as you so I am doing tons of modifications but not skipping a single rep! Just wanted you to know that you’re not alone and you got this! Lots of love from Serbia 💕

    1. Cool! Good luck! What will you be doing in terms of nutrition?