September 4, 2019
Last night I went to bed at 2am and today I woke up at 5:45am. Work has been extremely busy, and right now it’s just one of those season’s where I need to GRIND IT OUT. In addition to planning and designing new POPFLEX collections (omg some super cool stuff is on it’s way!!!), we’re slowly remodeling our Blogi HQ!
Back in February, I made a deposit for some new security gates to be made for our building – but the contractor kept making excuses like “I broke my finger”, “I’m in the hospital”, “My wife is in the hospital”, “My kids are sick”, “I’m sick”, “My mom’s sick”, “I’m going out of the country”…for weeks on weeks on weeks. I kept believing him, giving him the benefit of the doubt, but then, after a few months of this…I just felt really stupid for allowing myself to be led on. He kept promising he’d come next week, I’d wait, and he would never show up. He’d never pick up his phone calls and wouldn’t answer his texts. I cannot tell you HOW frustrated I felt and HOW cheated I felt. Sam – the more zen one between us – was like, just let it go. Think of it as a lesson.
ARRGHGHGHGHHHH!!!!!! I just felt constipated in my SOUL.
The worst part was, he was a referral from a trusted person. I never checked his Yelp reviews…until after the excuses started coming in. And guess what? He had a 1 and a half star.
*bangs head on desk*
Anyway, last week he decided to just straight up show up outta nowhere (on our work from home day) and demand the rest of his money…7 months later…for doing half the job. You know what, I could sit here and complain all I want, but the truth is, I’m just glad we have (half) our gates. I never thought they would ever come!!! (Don’t worry, we didn’t end up paying full price…but he did put up a fight.)
After the gates were installed, I felt this super heavy weight get lifted off my body. FINALLY I could flow again. I had been WAITING for the gates to get installed so that we could repaint the building! Immediately, I went to Lowes and looked at all of the color cards. The warm, peachy colors were calling to me so I ended up choosing Apricot Jam!
I am so lucky I was able to find a well rated painter to come and take this job this week. Things usually don’t come together this quickly. Especially not in my experience with contractors. I am also grateful because other things in my life and in my business have begun to oddly flow better as of recently. I don’t know what it is – but I think it has something to do with being honest with myself. Honesty hurts sometimes. And it can make you feel really really insecure and vulnerable, but I think it is so healthy to be there for a moment. Or else you end up living a life of delusion, wondering why things didn’t work out.
This blog has been so therapeutic for me, because I don’t try to be someone bigger than I am – which is kind of the game that “influencers” play on social media. I’m really sick of that whole scene. I prefer to be here, on my blog, just being me, doing my thing, figuring stuff out.
Anyway – life right now may be imbalanced, but at the same time, it’s in harmony. Sometimes I feel like my life is this chaotically choreographed dance. I’m spinning and leaping and bending every which way. No one knows what my next move is, sometimes not even me! But that next step is so important because if I don’t plant myself with confidence, everything will crash. And guys, I’ve crashed SO MANY TIMES. One day I’ll tell you guys about the things that cut me, but not yet. I’m just glad that my resilience has allowed me to get up and keep on dancing – bruises, cuts, and all 🙂
DAY 19 RECAP:
I left my Fit Journal at home (oops!), so no picture for today! Regardless, we’ll head right into breakfast.
So, I think I will need to begin cutting out dairy slowly in order for my progress to continue…but since I bought it already, I need to eat it! For breakfast, I made cottage cheese with blubes. You guys, the cottage cheese from Trader Joe’s is very mehhhh. I don’t like it! In fact, I despised it so much that I made Sam finish the creation above. Haha.
Pre-lunch snack was pepperjack cheese with thai chili almonds. YUM. This is actually such a fantastic combo.
Lunch was an ahi tuna salad from Tender Greens. As you’ve probably noticed by now, I eat a lot of the same stuff. I mean, why mess with perfection!!??
My sister came over and surprised me with this keto blueberry smoothie! Even though I was full, I downed it anyway. Honestly, I drink my calories way too fast. I downed this guy in like 5 minutes!!!
Was feeling ravenous so had some cashews post lunch and pre dinner.
We knew it was going to be a late night at the office, so Sam and I Postmated our dinner. I ate a slice of brisket with collared greens. On the side I had my mini bell peppers with homemade baba ganoush.
I am so sad to tell you that this time my baba ganoush does not taste as good!!! :*( OMG and I have so much to get through. The first time I used Chinese eggplants (long lighter purple ones) and this time I used the regular kind (black ones, more round). That has to be why.
Anyway, that’s my recap! Today my stomach feels less bloated so I think I’m getting back on track!