April 1, 2014
My latest project can now be revealed…THE CLEAN SPONGE!
Since I started Blogilates, I’ve always wanted to invent something that could help weight loss be easier for people. Well guys, I am SO PROUD to tell you that the patent I’ve been working on since I graduated with an Honors Degree in Biology from Whittier College has finally been approved by the US Patent Office!
I am crying tears now. Guys, this is a game changer. If you’ve always thought that the only way to lose weight was to eat clean and exercise, psh, well, I’m sorry I put you through all those “100 Burpee Burnouts” and “Bikini Blasters”. It was just to buy me time until this patent got approved.
But now I can tell you the truth.
The truth is…I’ve been hiding something from you.
This whole time I’ve been instagramming pics of healthy lettuce wraps and vegan bowls when in truth, all I’ve been eating is fried ice cream, In N Out burgers, Chinese takeout, and whatever the heck I please with no regrets, no consequences, while exuding the epitome of health.
I know. This invention goes against everything I’ve ever preached. But that’s because The Clean Sponge defies the laws of Physics, Biology, Chemistry and all the rules of the entire Universe and Galaxy.
Listen up guys. You can eat whatever you want, however much you want, regardless of how much fat, carbs, sugars or calories your food has and LOOK GREAT, FEEL GREAT, and perform at your optimal capacity.
So stop shopping at Whole Foods and protect your bank account! Just head to the local fast food chain, order up a combo and save yourself some time and money.
With my new invention, The Clean Sponge, you’ll be able to keep eating, keep sitting, do nothing, and LOSE WEIGHT. It’s perfect for beginner dieters all the way to advanced dieters!
Look at my friend Pierre’s Transformation!!
With The Clean Sponge, he lost 318 lbs in just 10 days! It’s incredible. He’s practically glowing!
Because Pierre had such an incredible experience with The Clean Sponge, he’s offered to take the first 1000 ladies (or gents) who buy the clean sponge on a date to your favorite fast food restaurant where he can personally show you how he uses his sponge. Act fast and get The Clean Sponge now. This offer won’t last long.
How do you use The Clean Sponge? Easy. It takes just 3 wipes to get lean.
1 wipe takes away the fat
2 wipes takes away the carbs
3 wipes takes away the calories
It’s too easy. You can adjust the sponge to how lean you want to get based on your goals. I sincerely apologize for not being able to share The Clean Sponge with you these past 4 years, but now it’s out and I want you to try it!!
Call 1-865-551-WIPE now! Operators are standing by. If you experience a wait, do not worry. Keep holding! We will help you as soon as we can! We are simply helping other customers as the demand for The Clean Sponge is extreme. I promise that we will be with you shortly.
If you can’t get a hold of us on the phone, then head over to www.TheCleanSponge.com to buy it now!! Remember, first 1000 customers get a date with Pierre, so don’t hesitate. Just buy NOW! You won’t regret it.
Because what’s better than eating mountains of pizza, having a six pack, and lying on the couch all day??
So let’s make your dreams come true. Every day can now be a YOLO Day.
Call 1-865-551-WIPE or visit www.TheCleanSponge.com