I feel so fake.

Fake. I’m beginning to feel so fake. Wearing red lipstick, holding these roses, and pretending like the thorns on these stems don’t hurt my hands. Why? Because I know that holiday photos like Valentine’s Day pics will get a lot of likes on Instagram.

Ughhhh. Listen to me. I’m playing a game, I know it, I don’t like it and yet I’m STILL doing it!

You guys wanna hear the truth??? The truth is…Sam didn’t buy me these flowers. I bought these flowers for myself from Whole Foods for $19.99 (got a coupon for $5 off), forced Sam to drive all over our neighborhood to find a random spot to take this pic, and then we got in a fight along the way because he said that all I ever do is worry about taking pics for IG.

I was mad. Mad because he was right. Mad because I let the pressures of Instagram control me. Mad because I felt like…I still had to do it. Sigh.

Sometimes I feel like Instagram imprisons me to keep creating pretty content just for likes and comments – instead of creating content that matters to me. Sometimes I just want to write but I don’t have an accompanying photo…so I don’t write at all. Sometimes the stuff that matters to me most get the least likes. Sometimes the stuff that matters to me least gets the most likes.

Sometimes, I just don’t want to live for likes. I just want to live for me.

So, last night the real me didn’t want to go to a fancy dinner. The real me didn’t need roses to validate our love. Sam and I choose to stay in. We wore retro sweats and matching avocado shorts. We Postmated some Memphis BBQ with collard greens and creamed spinach. Our dinner left us with BBQ sauce under our fingernails and smothered around our lips. It may be not have been “instagrammable” but it sure was REAL.

And real feels so nice.

 

75 thoughts on “I feel so fake.”

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  1. Susan says:

    I love seeing real, no bullshit posts about social media like this.

  2. alantz89 says:

    Long time follower first-time commenter: A loooong time ago you posted, I think it was an audition, video for a work out program that did pan out. But it was you! No Instagram, No pastel colors I think it was on a lakeshore or pond somewhere and it was still fun, ( and funny) and ultimately got the job done and was fun to watch and follow. Do you and keep being yourself you motivate people every day and that’s a blessing for all. Gym fashion is ridiculous I follow blogalaties because I hate going to the gym and feeling like I need the right color tank tops and tights ( I know its probably really profitable and your stuff IS SUUUPER cute and ya gotta make a living). Buuut I workout in a loose oversize tee and gym shorts, I’ve probably had since high school! You’re a great inspiration to not only make things happen for yourself but motivating people to make things happen for themselves as well. Keep it up! Happy New year and Happy #100daysofabs day 2!

  3. Galilea says:

    I don’t have an instagram account, because I think it creates some pressure in the user, nonetheless I also think is a tool to have fun, to show what you love to do and to share the important moments, so just do you don’t worry about anyone else and their expectations.

  4. lindsaygii says:

    I have never even looked at Instagram. It sounds terrible. Would you drink till you puked just because everyone else was doing it?

  5. Just Beyond says:

    This Thought process is so real. so very real. Everyone feels this way and everyone can’t seem to do anything about this. they want to but just CAN’T… All in the process of being acknowledged, we have left our real selves somewhere even we cannot see! let alone others… the simplicity in a picture or a comment is more worth than the complexity of making it simple!!

    Did this make any sense??

  6. Martina says:

    Ok this picture of you both.. AWESOME!!! I love those kind of pics 🙂

  7. Arely says:

    I deleted my instagram recently, and it felt like a weight off my shoulders! I use to find myself spending almost an hour getting the right picture, just for 7 likes; ridiculous. Thank you for being so real Cassey!

  8. JOYCE, WITH THE FLOWERS ON HER HAIR says:

    “And real feels so nice”. I love this. Thank you for your raw honesty, Cassey.

  9. Kortney says:

    Thank you for sharing this…Unfortunately, a lot of content creators feel this pressure, and as one, it has had times where it definitely put stress on my relationship.

  10. Michelle says:

    I can imagine the many instagram pictures are a lot to handle. That’s very cool of you to share how you really feel. Both pictures are wonderful!

  11. Paige says:

    I really like this post! I think you and Sam are so cute ( I know its a little late but congrats on getting engaged!) and I just think your so beautiful!

  12. Heather says:

    Thanks for sharing this post, Cassey! Instagram is a funny world – sometimes it feels like you either have to let it take over your life or become irrelevant when you take a break…

  13. Jessi says:

    <3Thanks for this post

  14. giulia says:

    I really love this post

  15. Alyssa says:

    Cassey, I love how REAL you are, and you show it! You are real in that your life is not perfect, you can get into fights, but you always turn out in the end, you come out on top to show that optimism and love shines through anything else. Life is not perfect! And sometimes we have to rearrange what matters most in life. You are forgiving, you are beautiful, and you are REAL! Thank you for being such an inspiration and example to all of us showing what matters most in life. I’m only 17, so your influence Cassey is definitely contagious.

  16. BShizzle says:

    Love that you made this Post! Too many young people are caught up in the “Instagram World”. We care so much about how we look online that people are losing touch with reality. It’s really great that someone in a role model position such as yourself, took the time to make this point. <3 Keep building us up, we need more people like you!

  17. Anna says:

    Late to the party, but your honesty is refreshing and sweet. The less styled pics mean much more because they are genuine part of you!

  18. Shannon McLain says:

    In my opinion, this picture is WAY more IG worthy! 😉 <3

  19. Anne from finland says:

    I love this post to! Im a mum to two little boys so its important to me that we show our kids that they dont need a million likes to be popular. Cassie you are such a great rolemodel for our kids out there today. Dont ever stop what you are doing. We need more people like you in this world.

  20. B says:

    I love this post. I’m just now reading it in March. I too feel a new to live up to a certain image. Be a certain person. Always be positive. And it’s just not real. I yearn to feel real. You have really encouraged me to be so with this post. Thank you for being real. That’s the very best you, or any of us!

  21. C says:

    My daughter just “shared” you with me and this is what I saw first. Bravo! I’m always buoyed by the younger generation seeing media for what it is…we need more of that as the future is in your care. Love your blog!

  22. Manon says:

    Cassie you’re definitely my favorite fitgirl, you inspire me so much! You’re the best!

  23. SUE says:

    It’s difficult to remain true to yourself and worry about the world instead you just being you! I’m glad you’re so honest and real. Life is tough…we have our struggles and deal with it the best we can that day and just remember and remind ourselves we only live once. To be honest, you pulled me through today with your words and encouragement and just started to work out again TODAY!

  24. Jessica Guadalupe Rojas Ramirez says:

    Glazed Donut🙊 It sounds so delicisious !!! And thank you for yor words 💕 I feel strong

    1. jessi says:

      Cassy I get confuse about how comment here 😂😂😂 I love you

  25. Samantha says:

    I always struggle between the balance of feeding the soul and eating healthy especially when my family wants me to eat a lot after overcoming my eating disorder.😕It’s very rough but I’m fighting really hard💚

  26. Paola says:

    Oh Cassey I love how real you are and honest because it’s so true and painfully real. As a teen well.. it’s even harsher

  27. Sara says:

    Cassey, you’re cool. Every once in awhile, we all trip up and get wrapped up in something that isn’t really true to who we are. You were a little too passionate in your work and it went overboard. And that is okay.

    And I know this post is old, but I am commenting anyway, because you are honestly one of my favorite people on the internet and you make me feel good about myself. I watch your YouTube videos so much my bf makes fun of me. And despite what a lot of these comments say about the “too perfect” posts, I think all your posts are pretty great.

    Keep up the awesome work.

  28. Daryl Bianca says:

    I love this!! I feel the same way about IG. You do you Cassey!!

  29. Persephone168 says:

    I love this post I am glad you stayed yourself 🙂 and I love the shorts!!!!

  30. Emma Carter says:

    I LOVE this! Thank you Cassey! Thank you so much for saying what I think all of us are feeling. And honestly, I would prefer to see you in your avocado shorts! This is so much cuter, more relatable, and most importantly, REAL! Sometimes seeing so many pretty pictures, so many perfect poses, it makes me feel inferior. Like you’re living some super glamorous life that I’ll never be able to achieve. But it’s not just you–it’s everyone. We’re all doing that, you know? And it’s dumb. In fact, I was just listening to a podcast from “Stuff Mom Never Told You” about this very subject. (You should check it out, they’re awesome!) So thank you. <3 I hope you feel more comfortable posting pictures like this in the future. You're beautiful and your real life is just as good if not better than a perfectly posed IGable picture.

  31. Marjolein says:

    I like you Cassey and I hope you stay you or go a little back in time, before the IG craze. I must admit that I visit your page less frequent just because of all these typical IG pictures. I guess ‘perfection’ bores me quickly. I don’t need perfect pictures to accompany a great message. The message is more important than an image. I like to use my imagination when reading.
    I guess you probably know, but getting likes and comments can become an addiction. It messes with the brain.

  32. inka.ripatti says:

    Where IS that dress from?? Love it.

  33. Sabra says:

    I am an infrequent IGer most of the time, but I could definitely relate to this when doing the PIITstagram challenge. I didn’t necessarily feel fake, but there were days I put on makeup just to take a selfie, and even in that short period of time I started getting really focused on likes. I hated it, and I finished the PIIT program but never finished the IG challenge for this reason.

  34. adrienne says:

    thank you just thank you for this xoxo

  35. Quynh Huong says:

    Wow… sometimes I see your pics on Insta and I feel like a fish out of water. I mean, some of your pics show how perfect your life is, and mine is not as perfect. But I read this post and I realize most liked Instagram photos do not mean anything. They are only flashy appearance – an empty shell. You are right, just be true to yourself, because we love who you really are, not who you pretend to be. I appreciate that Sam is so reasonable and realistic. He is truly a steady anchor for you in case you get carried away.

  36. Ruth says:

    I’ve been checking in with Blogilates since you started out, less so since becoming a first-time mom. And, I have to say that even though your image -both personal and professional- have changed dramatically, (and despite my short-lived frustration adjusting to different changes) I could see the pressure you’re talking about. Times have changed. Technology is becoming a marketing tool. And, image comes with this territory; it certainly does with the face of fitness. Oddly enough, people seem to expect it. If anything has not changed it’s who you are inside. So I’m not surprised by your candor. Good on you. And, THAT is the reason I keep checking in.

  37. Kat says:

    I love this post! Thank you so much for being real. Keep staying true to you!

  38. Maja says:

    This was so real. We love you for who you are, not what kind of picture you post. When you just want to write on instagram, just post a blank picture 🙂

  39. This is exactly how I feel about Instagram too! Love this post. Real is so much better.

  40. Amber says:

    Thank you for sharing this! It is super important for everyone to remember. <3

  41. thea.sophie says:

    The second picture is so cute! I am so happy for you two <3
    I am not on IG or any of that, I just watch your videos and do the calender!! I only created an account to use it online. So cool!!! And I clicked on this post because of the title not the picture!
    P.S. I want more Jackelyn Yoga videos, pls :):):):)

  42. Megan Burditt says:

    Love this. You are a real woman and a real inspiration. I see your light, but I also see your internal struggle to maintain the fame and stay in the limelight…which you worked so hard to create. Rest assured that by sharing your true thoughts and feelings you are being vulnerable. Being vulnerable isn’t a sign of weakness- it’s the biggest strength a person can have. It makes you relate-able, genuine, and REAL. Be the lighthouse…keep letting your light shine bright…it only helps harbor in more beautiful lights.

    I met you at the 2017 IDEA conference. I asked you what your biggest weakness was and how did you overcome it, and you responded with ‘public speaking’ and that you would watch various TED talks and outline the speeches in efforts to learn their style and organizational method. You are anything but fake. You are real with yourself, and as a result able to see where you need to grow and then you commit and DO IT! You are my inspiration. I’ve been teaching Mat Pilates for about 4 years and you make me believe in following my dreams, and one day starting my own business. Why? BECAUSE I CAN. Because I’m brilliant, passionate, full of love, and REAL. Don’t ever doubt yourself Cassey…you live in a tough town and are in a competitive industry. Keep being you…it is what has and will continue to set you apart from others. I have SO much love for you, and look forward to meeting you again in San Diego at the 2018 IDEA World Conference. I envision myself somehow working with you one day…it’s a weird intuition…but I’m learning to trust in the universal force…and trust my own intuitive self. KEEP BEING AMAZING <3

    Megan

    1. Melody says:

      Yes – this is a great comment. It’s about time people started relating to each other genuinely instead of “Hey-look-how-cute-I-am” which is fine but sustainable. Not everyone is cute 24-7. It just doesn’t work that way! Be cute when you want to and wear the avocado shorts (which really ARE cute, by the way!) when you need to! Anyone who tells you that they only like you when you’re pretty is a tool anyway and you don’t want them in your life. Enjoy your life in any way you see fit! (See what I did there? #nerd)

  43. annamaria says:

    Cassey you have been one of the people I admire,and look up to the most.You are always real and not afraid of being yourself. You taught me that others’ opinion shouldn’t affect me,and you also taught me how to be mentally strong -except from physically-. Social media unfortunately are ”forcing” us to always present an image that might not suit our personality or ourselves.What I wanna say is that you are so strong and independent,you must not be affected by the media. Be your own you Cassey because in the end what really matters is you honesty and your individuality. Thank you for inspiring me

  44. Nina says:

    Your real picture is not only better it also looks better! And it sounds like you had a great evening. Keep up the realness!

  45. Jaya says:

    I am not on IG anymore and it feels amazing. Living life void of the approval of others in the virtual world is refreshing. Why be squeezed into the ideals of people who are simply liking a photo? There is so much more to happiness than being validated by strangers.

    Your workouts are fantastic! Your transparency is admirable so who cares about being marketable? Having the best photo?

    1. Grace says:

      HI! It is the first time I read your blog, I came here looking for workouts because I want to be healthier this year. I drop all social media accounts for over one year now (inspired by Cal Newport’s ideas), and it is being great. Just like Jaya said above: it is refreshing. I imagine that you have to do it because it is part of your job, but it is good to “disconnect to really connect”. Thanks for the post, Bye!

      1. EmJ says:

        Lol, I never got on social media. Instagram, Twitter, Facebook….nothing. Yep, I was always that one weirdo in the class that stayed away from those things. And honestly, I’m glad I never got into them. I hear about people stressing about what they post, their followers, likes, etc, and I’m not surprised that it can bring on anxiety. It would for me too, and that’s one of the reasons I never jumped on the bandwagon. I don’t feel like I’m missing anything, and it allows me to focus on me, without the influence of others. It is refreshing, like you said, though I know it’s uncommon in this day in age lol. I wish more people could see that, and like you said, disconnect to really connect.

  46. Areej says:

    Personal blogs are relatable. Do continue them.❤️

  47. Danielle W says:

    Thanks for being real. I find it incredibly encouraging when famous and influential people open their hearts. I understand how important it is to create a personality that inspires others and keeps things positive. But it’s sure nice to see/ read about the ‘normal’ parts of super awesome you! That is what is most inspiring to me, PJ’s and BBQ sauce 😝 (I like the second pic much better, makes me smile….. And slightly hungry)

  48. Haley says:

    I really appreciate you writing this post. Instagram has always been difficult for me to get into because I don’t ever feel like I have pretty pictures to post like everyone else. Instead, I’ve always drifted more towards Twitter or blogs or Youtube. I think I’m far more of a words person than a visual person. Thinking about trying to post these perfect looking Instagram pictures all the time makes me feel anxious.

  49. Lynn says:

    Hi Cassey! I clicked this blog post from twitter and I really love your personal blog posts! The informational posts are great too but the personal ones really make it feel like a blog and personal diary you can share with us and feel more connected to you! ☺️💕

  50. Ariannah says:

    I want you to know that I like that you make posts pretty and colorful. I like that you always make life look so grand and it makes me want to push myself everyday. But that is not why I have worked out with you practically everyday for almost 4 years now. I have consistently stayed with you because I love who you are. I love that you strive to be real. I am sorry that Valentine’s Day did not start out the way you wanted, but I am glad you practice enough introspection to end it the way you wanted. You have followers who want you to be happy, healthy and successful in life. You have followers who want the best for you and that means being genuine and following your dreams.:)

  51. Angelica says:

    That’s a beautiful point you’ve made, Cassey. That kind of awareness is powerful, and is, as you’ve shown, the first step in creating personal, and thus lifelong change. I love this.

  52. Claudia says:

    Glad you are a person on instagram who isn’t fake! Also wondering, when will you and Lisa continue making podcasts? I look forward to it!

  53. Shan says:

    Second photo in the sweats is 100% better. 🙂

  54. pmancini says:

    Cassey you two are great together. You are amazingly beautiful. I love your videos and you are such an inspiration. Question, would you please do a video with absolutely no makeup on? Your personality overshadows everything anyways. PLease, more self help talks while exercising. love , love, love them.

  55. believedreamachieve1 says:

    Don’t be hard on yourself too much. Just do what you do and be you! Love U Cassey!

  56. Johanna says:

    This is so authentic Cassey and so refreshing to see. I don’t have an IG for that reason, I know I would spend a lot of time comparing myself and trying to get the “perfect” picture and caption to post. I miss out on the pretty pics and inspirational quotes but seeing posts like this one are so much better. Your fans love that we can relate to you and sharing moments like this inspires us to connect to our true selves. You and Sam are adorable in your matching avocado shorts! Thanks for keeping it real <3

  57. Sam says:

    I agree. You have never appear fake to me. I love your videos and I think you are a great role model. Keep doing what you are doing!

  58. Lauren says:

    Cassey, you have never come across as fake to me. Not ever, and that’s why you’re one of the only people I follow on social media who I don’t know irl! You have so many fans who love you precisely for your authenticity in a social media landscape that is so fake and overdone so much of the time. Thanks for refusing to cave to the pressure that is IG and always keeping it real <3

  59. Sarah says:

    Wow. I really am glad to know I’m not the only one who fought with my SO on valentines. I truly appreciate my man, he sticks through a lot. I think that IG has made a mark on my soul and I don’t want to play that game anymore..

  60. Samantha says:

    BREAK FREE Cassey! We can do this!!

  61. Cassie, I think after reading this you may have forgotten or misunderstand WHY people like your posts and follow you. It’s not cute pictures. It’s because you inspire others to take a journey that they might not feel able to do on their own. It’s you being able to say “I’m not perfect either” and showing others that we can still strive to better ourselves. I joined a gym feeling able to get into better shape because you show me that it’s okay to not be perfect but still go after fitness goals. Take some time off social media and think back to when you began Blogilates. Was it to make money or be a social media star? I highly doubt it. Take a moment to refocus your attention so it goes into what made people like you originally. Yes, things change over time but we are still ourselves. I’ve said this before to your friend Lindsey Stirling, who also feels that she needs to put up a front for her fans even though it’s precisely her vulnerabilities that have made her as endearing as her music. I have a tagline that I use as a daily mantra: Be fearless. Be fearless Cassie. Be fearless to be the real Cassie and not a filtered alter ego. Life moves by quickly and you don’t want to waste it trying to hold up an image that isn’t you. Be fearless.

    1. Marjolein says:

      yes!

  62. Julianne says:

    I love your rawness and realness. Social media has become a place where I, and I think a lot of other people, feel depressed. Constantly trying to feel like you have to measure up is so unhealthy for everyones mental health. It is a breathe of fresh air when someone shares their real struggles. Even if this post doesn’t get the most likes, keep being you, because the real authentic you is much more beautiful than just a cute picture! You are truly inspiring, and your heart is what makes me admire you and the work that you do. <3

  63. JenniferN says:

    I admire people on Instagram who are real. Sure pretty looks great but it also gets boring when that’s all a person posts!

  64. Cassey, this is the best post on social media that you’ve shared in a long, long, time. It’s real, it’s authentic, it’s perfect in its imperfection. I really hate that social media is all about aesthetics nowadays, even though I like it myself and adhere to “Instagram Standards”.

    Thank you for sharing this. <3 I cannot stress this enough.

  65. Virjinia says:

    I actually love the second picture better! Yes you may get likes for all the “pretty” pictures but you’ll gain valuable connections and relationships from the second picture. My numbers aren’t sky high but I met so many awesome people on IG and real life by being authentically me!

  66. ndsullivan says:

    Instagram is so fun for me to look at because I love seeing all the pretty things, but it really doesn’t take very long until I start the comparison game and need to take a break. My husband already teases me about taking Instagrammable pictures. I can’t imagine how much pressure there must be for a public figure that uses social media for their brand and their message. Good for you for posting this anyway! I think it speaks more truthfully and authentically toward the dangers of comparison and value of messy real life than just a quote picture on IG or something. I really appreciate your openness and honesty. It’s good for me and everyone else, I imagine, to see that people are just people even if they magically look fabulous in rompers and can pilates like a rockstar. 😉

  67. Mistralka says:

    Oh Cassey… Likes don’t matter. You should know this, love. It’s about enjoying what you do. If you don’t enjoy doing the pretty-pretty pics for IG, then don’t do them! Do the ‘ugly truth’ pics instead! They hold more value, at least they’re real! 😀 Don’t be a poser just because you feel someone expects that from you, just do you. And if I’m being honest, that V-day pic of you two is fabulous! <3 There's nothing better then staying in together. :3

  68. Lacey says:

    Live for you Cassey! The fact that you are so honest is what I love about you! I love the funny pictures like this much better! What you want is much more important than likes, and likes aren’t worth getting into fights for!! You are amazing! Just be you!

  69. Angela says:

    Thank you for sharing Cassey! I feel like you just put my feelings about those likes into words. I need to learn to live for me too. Thanks for being real, honest, and dorky. Avocadon’t give up!

  70. Debuccinoart says:

    Loved this post so much and it definitely is relatable. I am an artist, and while I love making art, I sometimes feel pressured to post on instagram/social media. I found myself making art just to post instead of making art for myself. We are all getting better all the time, thank you for posting this!