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Finding your Balance: Why You Shouldn’t be Obsessed with Having a Swimsuit Body

I was at the gym today and had a pretty good convo with a friend of mine while getting my cardio on on the Precor machine. We talked about our moms and why they were on a constant weight loss battle and why everyone cares so much about having Victoria Secret model abs and an inner thigh gap. It’s become an obsession for a lot of young women especially. For some reason, we all think we need to be swimsuit ready at all times. We get frustrated when we don’t get results quick enough and begin to let our physical appearance dictate our self worth.

Why? I think media is a part of the blame.

We are bombarded with magazine covers of women with perfect bodies and sculpted abs year round. Our Tumblr feeds are strewn with images of fake boobs and six packs. We hear the praise for models and actresses who have lost weight so quickly after pregnancy. We read the condescending stories in the tabloids that make fun of women who have added pounds onto their frame.

Everywhere I go nearly every female I talk to is overly concerned with her weight and physical appearance. And it’s obvious why! Our society has become crazily OBSESSED with looking young and thin. We place women who can achieve this look on the front of covers, in movies, on shows, and we push them more and more into the public eye. Ultimately, the more often we see something, the more we begin to idolize it. We begin to think that yes, we too must look like that. We think that if we don’t look like that, then we should at least strive for it.

Here’s the problem. Not everyone should strive for that perfect bikini model look.

Think about it like this. If you were meant to be with someone then you shouldn’t have to put so much effort into the relationship to make it work and be in love. If you were meant to be a good doctor then going to med school should be enjoyable and you shouldn’t have to struggle tremendously to get through it. Does this make sense?If you were meant to do something, you should be good at it. If your body was meant to be at a certain place, then let it be there, work out and eat clean to maintain healthiness and longevity, but don’t work against yourself to a point of frustration and exhaustion.

Not everyone was meant to have a bikini body. And you need to realize that and be okay with it and focus your energy and talent elsewhere where you can thrive! We’re all born with different body types. We are also born with different talents! Maybe instead of spending 3 hours in the gym daily just to keep a certain body fat %, you could be spending 1 hour at the gym, looking healthy, and spending the other 2 inventing the next best app or writing the next best cookbook. You know what I mean? Just because all the mags tell you that we have to be 5’10”, 110 lbs, and have 36-24-36 measurements, it doesn’t mean that that is YOUR personal goal.

Now don’t get me wrong. Anything is possible. I encourage you to push the envelope and drive yourself to success even in the face of adversity. However there is a point of diminishing returns. Once your decision to lose weight and “look better in a bikini” starts to interfere with your character and your quality of life, it is TOO MUCH.

I think that we need to step back, allow our natural capabilities to shine, and instead of focusing on our flaws, we need to focus on enhancing our talents.

I wrote this post today because I want you to redefine your goals. Don’t let the definition of your abs dictate your feelings of self worth. Instead, look deeper. Enjoy the journey to your fitter self, embrace the strength your acquire, and if weight begins to come off, then fabulous – you got more out of this than just pounds lost. You’ve got skill, you’ve got technique, and you’ve mastered the power of molding your own destiny. Try to find what you want in sculpting a happier YOU. Not just sculpting a more toned bod. Develop your talents to minimize what you see as “flaws” and I can assure you that you’ll be glowing from the inside out. Your smile and vibrance will be magazine cover ready.

Have a Fabulous Friday everyone!

<3 Cassey[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

The Conversation (100)

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  • Jefferey says:

    Hmm is anyone else experiencing problems with the images on this blog loading?

    I’m trying to figure out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog.
    Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

  • Hi, just wanted to mention, I liked this blog post.
    It was practical. Keep on posting!

  • Leandra says:

    I really appreciate this. BMI gets way overused in the media and even by the first lady in her fit kids campaign. I was born a fat baby, my dad was born a fat baby, and my mom has always been really thin. Guess whose genes by body is expressing? Also, my proportions (wide shoulders, wide hips, long torso, short legs) and my musculature (think football player leg muscles rather than dancer leg muscles) mean that my mass will naturally distribute differently, and too many people don’t understand that. But at the same time, I know I CAN look better than I do now, and I know that when I have less weight (to a certain point) I FEEL better too, so thank you for setting me on my journey =)

  • Annie says:

    As a girl struggling with an eating disorder, your posts about self acceptance, weight gain, and body diversity are really helping me. I struggle constantly with thoughts that I need to look a certain way and only eat a certain amount, and your blog posts really help me when I’m having negative thoughts. They remind me that the things I tell myself aren’t always right, and I hope that by continuing to read these when my thoughts get bad, I will learn to love myself. Cassie, thank you for loving everyone’s bodies and accepting them all even when I can’t accept my own yet :) I just want you to know how much I appreciate your posts like these. xoxo

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  • Sophie says:

    What a positive post, I love it! you are so right, we are all too obsessed about what everyone else thinks about us in a swimsuit when we should just make the most of what we have. Also dressing to your shape is the best move as you there are so many styles out there that will flatter you.

  • ashh says:

    Its amazing how many people have eating disorders. i tried to cut down on food once in my life (i dint have an ed or anything. i just cut 200 calories i think) and became slim … but gained it all back in a year… i swear im not trying that again. never. i rather excercise and eat clean. and i eat whatever i feel like (but not in huge quantities) and i feel good. when ever i get confused between two extremes my mom always says we should always choose the middle path. thats the most important teaching of lord buddha. You shouldnt became crazily obsessed with your waist line nor should you let your self go and eat everything your hands come across. middle path is always the right path. eat right and excercise but dont worry yourself. dont let yourself go but dont be hard on your self either.

  • Kathryn says:

    Im finding it hard to manage pilates with you and not loosing weight. I am 5,8 and 125lbs, I don’t want to loose any weight as it would be unhealthy on the bmi scale, I just want to tone up and feel strong in myself. I have been eating as I always have, which is healthy anyway, but lbs keep dropping off, I am having to hold back on your videos and eat more then I would usually. I feel as though this whole struggle is getting me down and damaging my self esteem, do you have any ideas on how to change this?

    xx

    • Alicia says:

      Hey there Kathryn,
      I may not be Cassey, but I am trying to help you with your problem. The reason why you’re so skinny is because of your high metabolism and genes! But, just like everyone else, you still have fat on your body. Pilates targets fat with cardio burning and muscle toning, so your body is dropping fat. I can understand why this must be scary for you, but stay positive. There is a silver lining :) The best advice I can give to you is try to drink more water and eat small meals throughout the day. That way, your metabolism is still working just as fast, but it has some food to work on. If you’re already eating a lot, I suggest adding more PROTEIN! If you want to avoid protein in food, try it in powder and add it to a shake or water. Protein is what fills you up, and what helps you get the most out of your work-out. Plus, you’ll feel super energized. :) You can get through this, I promise.

  • Ilene Shen says:

    Thank you so much Cassey for writing this post. It’s actually very powerful and influential, and serves as a positive reminder to me. I totally agree with you on this point, and it makes me think about what I have, and that I should stop comparing myself to other people. The media does really warp a lot of things for everyone. Being healthy is the most important. Again, thanks so much, love you!!!!!!
    xoxoxoxoxoxoxo <3
    Ilene

  • Claudia Rose says:

    I absolutely LOVE this post Cassey!
    I had to go through nearly a year of anorexia with bulimic and anorexia athletica tendencies – gym 2 hours every day, consuming a max. of 300 calories a day, thinking about nothing but food and exercise – to realize that what I was doing wasn’t normal, sustainable or healthy. I got help and started to recover, going from 46kgs to 56kgs in about 3 weeks. I’ve had days where I hated my body and relapsed, not wanting to eat at all that day. But I’m better now. I feel stronger than ever before and most of all, at 57kgs, 5″5, I’m happy with my body. I’m not toned. I have fat. But I can see hip bones and ribs and collarbones still and I’m skinny. I’m not thin, I’m not underweight, I’m not fat. I’m normal. And I’m happy with my body. I just wasn’t meant to be one of those 5″10, 110pound girls. I’m okay with that.
    So thank you for this post. Really, thank you :)

  • Sigrid U says:

    <3 <3 Cassey

  • Katia says:

    i just recently started reading your blog and i love it! i was a little scared when i first came across it because i am in recovery from an eating disorder and an exercise addiction. Unlike drugs and alcohol addictions i can’t completely cut out my “drug” of choice and still remain healthy so im always looking for healthy places to find new things and positive support. Thank you so much for breathing reality into your blog!! Too much of the world today supports an unrealistic perfection its nice to find something that supports an attainable happiness!

  • AbbyRose says:

    I just found this site- I don’t even remember what internet rabbit trail I was following, but it probably had something to do with being too hard on my body- and I’m really glad that Blogilates exists. It’s not that being concerned with how you look is in and of itself a bad thing- I just want to respect myself & keep things in perspective. I have a very diverse group of friends & I love them all. They are all gorgeous to me, & not one of them is so similar to any of the others (or me) that I can say that we should be “the same”. I’m not sure why it’s so hard for me to accept that I can’t look like an airbrushed model in an ad?

  • Emily says:

    Great words Cassey!

  • Rosie says:

    Hey Cassey,
    I have NO idea whether you’ll even see this, but I wanted to thank you for taking the time to write this post! I’m in high school, and lately I’ve been crazy obsessed with “perfecting” my body image; so much so that I developed an eating disorder. Obviously, once I realized that my binging fit the checkpoints of having a serious problem, I’ve tried to stop and heal myself from the inside out. You have no idea how much it means to me to have someone like yourself telling me that it’s okay not to push myself to extremes to reach that “perfect body”. Thanks so much!

  • Kate Swafford says:

    I am almost (gasp) 35yrs old. I have never been one for exercise, nor did I ever really need to….that is until good ‘ol mother nature and father time came into play. I have had a lot of medical issues that have caused me to really HATE exercising. I have suffered from severe Rheumatoid Arthritis since I was 8yrs old, and it’s caused tons of damage and major crippling in my wrists and fingers. I also had a c-section w/my son, who’s now 7. Then, last summer (almost a year ago exactly), I had a tubal pregnancy & it burst. I had to have another c-section & an emergency blood transfusion to save my life. I was 4mths preg when it happened. Then, to top it off, this past Feb., I lost twins, so needless to say, my body was pretty shot.

    I discovered your youtube video’s and began doing them sometimes twice a day (I prefer the 30min pilates vids). Fast forward two months and I look and feel like you 25yr old girls who don’t know what a stretch mark or cellulite is! LOL
    I fit into clothes that I NEVER thought I would wear again (can you say string bikini??), and my arthritis has actually never felt better!! I have the energy to keep up w/my son (who loves doing the cardio routines w/me), my mental health is soooo much more improved and my love life, well, I bet you can guess how happy my husband is with the new-found flexibility!
    Thank you for giving so many girls and women a confidence in themselves, for who they are and not what they look like! You’re such a Peach!

  • Tess says:

    I just wanna thank you Cassey for an amazing post as always!
    I’m used to working out, been doing it my whole life, but after I started doing your workouts about 7-8 months ago, I’m actually more in love with working out than ever.

    For me it’s always been some kind of an obsession to be thin, meanwhile that I really loved working out. I just took it to the extremes mostly. I went nuts if I hadn’t worked out for the day and felt like all my “invisible” fat was dumped on me just because of one missed workout.
    But now, I’ve gotten rid of that obession, almost completely. More on a healthy level to push myself to work out to feel good. Now it’s not: I HAVE to work out today. More of a: oh, I’d like to go for a run. Be nice to move a bit in the fresh air. + some cassey workouts.
    And it’s for fun. And I’ve found that it’s so much easier to stay in shape and get rid of some extra pounds (although i dont keep track) when you enjoy it.
    My goal is not loosing a certain amount of kg, I’m already thin. Now, that I have you as my inspiration, it’s about having a lean, beautiful muscular body to replace a thin body (but built? on fat) and I feel stronger this way too!

    I hope it made sense! And I may have my binging days but I dont beat myself up about them anymore. I have confidence, think positively and know that I have the strength to work out more due to one of those less great days, and get right back in the saddle again.
    There really is a difference of saying: I give up, and: I’ll keep on trying and fighting!

    And I got my first ever comment that I was fit, today!! My friend actually checked me out and said that he noticed that I’d been working out! And I’m so thrilled and happy!! :DDD

    Thank you Cassey!

    Love from Tess (and my mom who’s also a crazy, loving fan of yours! )
    Hugs and kisses from Sweden!

  • Jessie says:

    Hey Cassey,I wanna ask u something. How old were u when u started eating clean? I’m from Serbia an I love ur workouts. U r gr8!

  • runnerrn says:

    This is an absolutely fantastic post, Cassey. You have a lot of influence on those who follow your blog and do your workouts. Thanks for making that influence count!!! Keep it up :-) :-) PS- You are an exceptional writer!!!

  • honey says:

    I decided to lose weight because I was obese back then, but I definitely wouldn’t lose weight because I think I’m fat, as long as I have normal physique and within a normal range on my BMI I’m good. I lost weight because I worked hard for it, I eat right, I exercise and I use Roca Labs to aid me while losing weight. I successfully lost my excess weight, now I’m maintaining it. I’m very happy of what I look now and would never dare lose weight so I would look good in a bikini.

  • Ruo lin says:

    Being a young, active American girl, living in Asia has been really difficult for my self image. Everyday I’m surrounded by girls who are skinnier than is physically possible for me and their mothers are calling them fat. I know I’m not thin, I don’t have a bikini body, but the kids here call me fat. Fat, something I’ve never been called. Things like that really tear me up. Societal pressure for perfection is everywhere.

    • AbbyRose says:

      I knew a girl from China who was an exchange student to my high school in Texas. She had always been told that her (American size 7) feet were huge, couldn’t find shoes to fit her, & was teased mercilessly. She had serious insecurities about every little thing that she ate & even scolded her host family for eating so much at dinners (they were very sporty & not overly concerned about calories) & it was amazing to me how hard on herself she always was. You should love yourself, always, & not take it to heart when you are teased, but when it gets really tough, talk to someone from a different place, because we are all battling insecurities, but everything is beautiful somewhere :)

  • sarah says:

    Thank you for writing this. It’s right on!

  • Molly says:

    This is really what I needed to read right now and be reminded of, thank you so much and know you are making a difference!

  • Elizabeth says:

    I understand the tone of this post is probably intended to be a positive one, but it doesn’t sit well with me at all. Everyone already HAS a “swimsuit body”, and that’s a good thing! I apologize if I simply misinterpreted what the author was trying to convey, it’s just something about the tone of this post seems “off” to me.

  • Lisa says:

    I read your blog because you teach me to be healthy and positive. I was neither healthy nor positive before I found you. I love the balance you give us, and the challenges you share. I’ll admit I’m not happy with my physical body but your attitude taught me that all I need is to believe and keep trying and I’ll get there. That makes me love myself in a way I could not before.

    Hugs,
    Lisa

  • Lisa says:

    Great message! I think its really important to have a healthy body than a skinny body. Some people are just not meant to be really tiny, it will make them lose their menstrual cycle, develop osteoporosis, and all that ugly stuff. Its great to have fitness goals, but not put too much focus on them and realize if you start alienating friends and family its probably time to look at your food and fitness routine and see if you are pushing too hard.

  • M'Red says:

    Hi Cassey!
    Thank you for the timely post. I agree that the media bombards us with images of “female perfection” that can be impossible for most of us to maintain. The pressures are huge and for some of us, we are not even aware about how much this affects one’s expectations of oneself and self-worth. I am currently struggling with this issue and realizing that my mood and happiness should not be dictated by the number on the scale or my current measurement. (I knew this already, but you would never guess that they way I’ve been acting/thinking over the past few months.) This does not mean that I don’t want to look good in a bikini! ;-) But I am through with obsessing over every calorie eaten, every workout missed, and every deadline missed because I did not make the strides that I think my body should have accomplished and reached my weight goal. I am tired and stressed and not a happy camper. And this is not me. So, I have recently decided to stop all the obsessing and let my body do its thing. I am still going to exercise and eat clean. But I am not going to set any deadlines for when I need to reach a certain weight goal. I’ll still try new workouts. But I am not signing up for any more events or programs that will just stress me out more.

    Thank you for sharing your ideas on this important topic. Thank you for validating some of my feelings and thoughts. And thanks for your blog! You have made me feel so much better about my decision. And I know that I’ll be happier for it.
    xo,
    M’Red

  • Tess says:

    Hi! I actually started crying when reading this.. I spend like most of my time thinking about my weight and how i look, that I’m too fat and that as long as I look like this I wont be happy. I know that it is a waste of time, but I cant stop. I work out and eat pretty clean, but still dont lose weight, and I guess its like you wrote; not everyone is meant to have a swimsuit body.. I hope that one day I will start to appreciate the body that I have. I know deep down that I’m not actually overweight, and even though I’m not skinny, my body is healthy, and probably the way “it” wants to be. But I guess I’m not ready to accept my body the way it is yet..

    You are such an inspiration to me! Your posts always makes me smile, and your vids makes me cry (because of pain :) ). Love ya !!!

  • Keisha says:

    Great point cassey! I never even read magazines but you still see those images all over the internet. I really wish we could embrace bodies of all sizes more especially when being larger doesn’t necessarily mean not as healthy.

  • Renee says:

    Thank you so much Cassey. This post is exactly what I needed right now. I have been beating myself up for not achieving super fast results, or beating myself up for having a “cheat meal” or indulging a little bit. It’s so hard when you want something so bad and you work hard for it but see other people who don’t work as hard reaping the benefits of a body that you can never have- whether it’s because of genetics or whatever. I’m going to take your advice and redefine my goals. Start fresh and really ask myself what I what to accomplish and set smaller goals for myself so I can track my progress. You’ve even inspired me to start my own blog! I haven’t finished setting it up yet, but I’m going to use to it to track recipes, workouts, and some fun DIY projects for my new apartment that I’ll be moving to in September.

    Thank you for being so awesome!

  • Danielle says:

    This is a great message to get out there. For those on the photoshop and magazines side of things have a look at this youtube video created by photographer Stephan Bollinger showing what goes into creating a magazine image. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKd8AlRpWXQ Personally I don’t mind some photoshop as there are so many different levels of alteration (from colour adjusting to skin smoothing) but I think its important to understand what it is.

  • Jodie says:

    Super like this post :)

  • Elizabeth Alvarez says:

    I think some people may have misconstrued your intentions and actions regarding the bikini competition. Especially because the results you had were so physically amazing; it is easy to assume it was mainly for physical/ outward reasons. But from what I observed, (IMO), you are always challenging yourself, pushing and striving to do more, be more, reach and surpass goals…and to do those things, a lot of inner growth and change has to take place before even the outward physical change happens. I am proud of you. I know you are not obsessed about the outward physical appearance. I think thats exactly why you put up this post. But sometimes, I do think you allow people’s opinion of you and what you are passionate about affect you negatively; especially if it is not a favorable opinion. Some fans, you’ve indicated, have acually made you cry…because of their opinions. Anyhow, I know you have a generous, gracious, beautiful heart and spirit. Thanks for all you do. Actually…I kinda needed this post myself. I was starting to feel a little dip in my mood because my body wasn’t changing as quickly as it once did, and disappointment just started to set in. Thanks for this insightful reminder. I actually need it today Cassie.

  • sue says:

    Hi Cassey! I just wanted to say how much I enjoy your blogs and your workout vids! I just moved to a new town/state a few days ago (alone) and really haven’t made any friends yet (how sad!). So your vids have been a real help to me. I can continue to work out with your youtube vids and your sunny personality makes my day! Thanks! :]

  • Erynn says:

    I needed to hear this today, Thank you.

  • I love you. I needed to hear this and am so touched by your words!!

  • Lisa says:

    I really needed such a post today, so thank you so, so much, Cassey, for writing this! It made me feel a lot better and truly helped me to conquer those unhealthy, dysfunctional “eating disorder thoughts”. :)

  • Alyssa says:

    “Not everyone was meant to have a bikini body.”

    Actually, everyone already DOES have a bikini body. I appreciate you posting the “bikini blaster” series because they are fun workouts, but in actuality there is no physical requirement for wearing a bikini. All that’s required is that you are comfortable with yourself.

    • Lucie says:

      Amen to that Alyssa!! It’s really our own comfort level and confidence that stop us from wearing one. I personally love seeing all body types at the beach having fun and not concerned about how they look!

    • Brooke says:

      “Actually, everyone already DOES have a bikini body.”

      Thank you, Alyssa, I was thinking the exact same thing.
      I understand this post is intended to be positive, but I feel it misses the mark.

      Cassey, I don’t think this was your intention, but saying “Not everyone was meant to have a bikini body” is pretty off-putting.

    • Vicky says:

      Agree with Alyssa. I love you Cassey but that was a poor choice of words.

      • mary khoury says:

        agreed! I am confused by this blog too “not everyone was meant to have a bikini body” no two people look exactly the same so my bikini body may be different from another girl’s but that doesnt meant she or I do not have a bikini body. I guess if the bikini a person wants to wear fits and they feel comfortable wearing it then thats thier bikini body and good for them!

    • Jill says:

      Exactly – thanks for posting this, Alyssa :)

      Cassey, I normally love everything that you post, but I was really disappointed to read your statement that “not everyone was meant to have a bikini body.” I understand that you’re trying to promote body acceptance, but the implication of your words is that only some women should wear bikinis – and that seems to me to be a pretty clear case of body shaming.

      • Anna says:

        This might just be my interpretation but i don´t think Cassey is saying that there is just one bodytype fit for wearing bikinis. The media uses the word bikini body to portray a certain type of physique.. like in the magazines ´get that amazing bikini bod´.
        And i think Cassey is just trying to convey that THAT kinda bikini body is not for everyone.. not that a bikini is restricted to a certain body type.

  • Gabi says:

    Cassey you know how to brighten someone’s day! This is so insightful and true! Thanks for the boost of confidence and for showing us how much you care! You’re an awesome person, wish I could meet you in person!! Have a totes fab wknd sweetie! :)

  • Sarah says:

    Thanks so much for this Cassey! This was exactly what I needed to read today :)

  • pallavi says:

    Thanks Cassey! really needed to hear this, I’ve spent too many hours in front of the mirror unhappy, even though I’ve been working out like a maniac. I’m in a good place and I think it comes to a point where you should just be happy, and move on! :)

    keep being an inspiration to us all! xo

  • Jamie Lee says:

    Cassey, this is exactly what I needed to hear today. It is true in every aspect of life! Striving for something should never make us feel worthless, ashamed of ourselves or not good enough! Even working out a little bit each day should be enough to feel good about ourselves :) !!
    You are so amazing that you for all of your kind words, wisdom and encouragement. You are so cute in all of your videos and no matter what kind of mood I am in or how I am feeling about myself I always seem to come to your blog/youtube videos get encouraged and turn the day around.
    Your happiness and kindness shine like the sun! THANK YOU CASSEY!! Wonderful message :)

  • Michelle says:

    Great post!! I completely agree. I want to become a fitness professional to help women and girls feel sexy! Yet, I want them to feel sexy with themselves the way they are… all body types! Remember ladies: it is a model’s JOB to look a certain way! If we had the same luxuries (personal trainer, personal chef, etc) we’d probably look “perfect” too!!

  • J says:

    Hi, I think your entry today is fantastic. Everything you’ve said is commendable and should be taken on board by so many women and girls who are constantly bombarded with such negative messages about the female body. I think promoting a healthy lifestyle will improve the self worth of our society, however usually you’re the total antithesis of this. Over the past six weeks or so your blog has gone from being a really enjoyable site to visit to being a much more damaging platform, which I think is a massive shame. I’m still an avid devotee of your workouts, which are undoubtedly fantastic, it’s just upsetting the tone of the website has shifted

  • Marquel says:

    Thanks for your comments, Cassey! I really like how we can band together and talk about how skewed the media really is. Just because we see that extremely small percentage of women looking “perfect” on a magazine covers, that doesn’t mean that the other 99% of American women need to look like that. We don’t and we won’t! (haha! New slogan of my nonexistent protest). We are pretty and we don’t need to be super skinny to be that way. So ha.

    • Michelle says:

      Fit/strong is better than skinny anyway!!

  • amy q says:

    i love this article. but i have to say sometimes i feel fitblrs and fitness gurus also take it to the extremes :| like clean eating (and i mean super hella clean like no freaking seasoning fruits and shiz) i’m just like GUUURL add some spice to that life! i went vegan for a day and i freaking loved it! SO much energy! but anyways,what i meant was nowadays a lot of fitblrs promote a healthy lifestyle yet their diet is so narrowed and restricted.. people need to think long term. will i really avoid fruit for the rest of my life and live on animal protein? dont think so. in the future, shit’s gonna start getting either pricier, either low quality. EAT HAPPY AND HEALTHY!

    • Tanja says:

      Hmmm I think she never promoted avoiding fruits… she did it only for 1 week before the competition and she also told that this is not healthy dieting. I don’t know which fitness blogs are you following, but don’t listen to them if they say don’t eat fruits! :)

      • amy q says:

        well pretty much the ‘bodybuilders/lifters/competitors on tumblr! no fruit, no dairy (not even low-fat), no seasoning, and i asked one of them if it was really necessary to cut out all fruit to lean out and she was like ‘ye no cutting no abs’ and im like whaaat cassey used to eat fruit and shes pretty lean.. psh i love my apples and strawberries anyway. but yeah i guess you cant always trust what goes around the internet! :)

        • Megan says:

          I’ve seen that on tumblr too and my thought is anyone that tells you fruit is bad for you doesn’t know what they’re talking about. Some things on some fitblrs are craaaazy!

  • helene says:

    Thank you so much for posting this. I find myself needing a reminder every now and then.

  • BDDB says:

    Thanks for posting this.

    It’s sort of the flip-side to what you posted but your post reminded me of an article I saw the other day about a totally bad-ass Olympic lady lifter who is barely scraping by: http://www.buzzfeed.com/jtes/the-strongest-woman-in-america-lives-in-poverty

  • Danni says:

    This is wonderful!! I was feeling really down this morning because I kinda pigged out last night and I’ll be in a bikini today.

    This is the kind of stuff the girls need to hear more often! We need to make stuff like this our mantra and break free of the feelings of guilt and despair for not having that “model” body.

    I’ve shared this link, along with pictures of excerpts from here, for my followers on Tumblr!!

    Thank you Cassie, you do so much more than you can possibly realized!

  • Katie S says:

    This is a great message, thank you for sharing Cassey! :)

  • Val says:

    Thanks, Cassey! I totally needed that today!

    For as long as I can remember I have looked at models in magazines, scrutinizing their inner thigh gap and holding their tiny thighs as the golden standard of great looking legs. Lately, I’ve begun to realize that tiny thighs is not how my body works. I’ve gotten back into running and love doing your videos and I need my strong thighs. I have also always been ashamed of my “meaty” calves but after doing your bikini blaster legs workout the other day with all those calf raises at the end, I see them in a new light. I am really trying to appreciate my body for what it can do and now that I’m getting my muscle definition back, I am bikini ready.

    I love your encouragement to exercise for health as that should be the #1 reason I exercise. It shouldn’t be for some unachievable goal. If only we could redefine what it means to have a bikini body. Even when fitness magazines make covers of women who are healthy and not stick skinny, they are still teeny tiny and a shape I’m just never going to be.

    Thanks, Cassey. Seriously, you rock! Thank you for all that you do.

  • Emma says:

    Your post about the media reminds me of when Self magazine put Kelly Clarkson (a naturally curvy girl) on their cover promoting health and wellness…and then photoshopped her to look thinner. They said it was because they wanted her to look her “personal best”…because her actual personal best wasn’t good enough to be on the cover? They should’ve celebrated her curves instead of trying to make her fit what the media has determined as being “attractive.” I’ve boycotted Self magazine ever since.

    It’s probably a pipe dream, but I can’t wait until the day when magazines have to insert text at the bottom of photos to show how much they’ve been digitally altered. I can’t wait until gossip magazines no longer talk about who’s lost how much weight and who’s gained a few. I can’t wait until EVERY body type is celebrated and encouraged! Whether you’re thin or curvy or somewhere in-between, everyone has the ability to have an amazing body and be healthier. It shouldn’t be about looks, it should be about how you feel! I’ve always really liked that you promote toning up and being healthy as opposed to being thin. You’re awesome, Cassey, and don’t forget that! :)

  • Haley says:

    Awesome post, thank-you! I’ve been an obsess-or since I was a teen and now in my 30’s after having a baby been trying to lose the last 20lbs. For the first time in my life I have made the decision to accept and love myself as I am. It wasn’t easy at first but with practice I’ve learned to love my body more and I feel so much better! That doesn’t mean I don’t care to reach my goals in fitness, it just means I’m enjoying the ride a lot better:) Cheers! Thanks again for the great post <3

  • Roxanne says:

    I really appreciate that you are a fitness instructor who tries to blog about body positivity and emphasize health and self-love as motivation (as opposed to motivating through negativity). Thanks, girl.

  • Ju says:

    I rarely exercise, more into “hitting the books” than the gym. But yeah, all it takes is for one person, usually someone you trust, to make that comment, “You gained a little.”

    That’s what led me to Blogilates last week. I think I did obsess over the videos you posted and figuring out what to do each day with the workout calendar, but in doing the videos and reading the comments–I had to be real. Don’t expect changes to occur right away. I’m still making the transition to eating clean (some things are just hard to give up), but my goal from doing your workouts isn’t to lose weight or look good anymore. It’s to feel healthier and sweat out the stress. It’s funny that a week after following your channel and doing some of the videos, I can finally lift a full gallon of water in each hand without struggling to open a door.

    I think the problem with the looks issue is people don’t feel confident in themselves. It’s hard. But I think if we know what we’re weak at and make an effort to improve on those things, then that’s what makes us better people.

  • Rachel says:

    I totally agree with you Cassey! So many young women and teenage girls try SO hard to look like a model. Even I got sucked into the lie. Thank God, I got out :)
    Now, I just want to be fit to look good and be strong!

  • Karine Fortin says:

    I really appreciate that you spoke out about the “bikini body” dilemma. Having been fit in the past (figure skating then later, weight training). I lost my motivation when my kids were young. I now find that my body has put itself in a mode of “train as much as you want, your flabs/waist line/back, etc. are your current history” and as much as I eat clean and train at home, it doesn’t budge. I wonder if that is why women about to turn 40 like me get depressed…what used to be my full breast now heading down south, tight bellies and thighs becoming saggier. I seriously want to do like Tosca Reno and redefine my shell, but how to start ? I enjoy your Facebook commands and do them diligently as soon as they pop up and have great satisfaction that I got the drive… In the past, there was always someone else behind the wheel and I was on the backseat just following the orders and yes, my body was getting toned with lean muscles but I could no longer afford it money-wise … I have to find the confidence to take over the wheel and trust that I can put in place good training habits learned from you and Tosca. Thank you for keeping it real and thank you to transmit your smile through the videos too :) Cheers !

  • erin says:

    i appreciate your thoughts so much! it’s very true! <3!

  • Tinch says:

    Thank you!

  • Bee says:

    Cassey, thank you very very much for this. It kinda saved my day today!
    Much love,
    Bee

  • Janice says:

    man cassey ur so born do this… u motivate me each time you type, talk, and do… such a wonderul role model…. :)

  • Brooklynn says:

    What a great BALANCED post!

  • Jordy says:

    Cassey,

    First off I love this post! Second, I think it was about a year ago now that some young girls petitioned for Seventeen Magazine to stop photoshopping and start using pictures of models exactly as they are. The girls were tired of looking at pictures of impossibly small women they were supposed to strive to be or look up to. I believe their petition was successful; because now, if you pick up a Seventeen Magazine, the models look beautiful, realistic and health, not victoria secret thin. I thought it was pretty cool :)

    • Abelle says:

      That petition is actually still on-going, and unfortunately, Seventeen still Photoshops the hell out of all their images. :/

  • Laura says:

    Cassey, this is such a wonderful post!! I think most women go through a phase in life where they are desperate to look like the girls they see in magazines. They torture themselves, starve themselves or workout way beyond healthy limits. I’ve been there. I almost slipped into anorexia and I struggled with binge/purge behavior. It took me a while but I’ve come to accept my body as is and I eat enough to have energy and feel good all day, I workout an hour a day with one day of some relaxing yoga and I am super happy about my life and myself and I’m a lot more confident than I was when I was constantly dieting.
    It would be great if everyone would understand we are all different: we have different passions, we like different types of books/movies/music, we have different opinions, just like that we have different body types. Working out and diet shouldn’t be about achieving a certain body type but about getting the best out of what you have and most importantly being healthy!

  • Alicia says:

    This is a fantastic post. A friend just recently introduced me to your blog and for the last few days I have been obsessed with reading it!
    I had a baby 11 weeks ago and I had a very hard time. While everyone hopes for a natural birth, I, like many women, failed to progress and ended up with a c section. Then, six days after birth, I had a horrible fever and was rushed to the hospital via ambulance for what ended up being a four day stay. My husband stayed with me while our daughter stayed with my parents. While I was in the hospital, between rounds of antibiotics and more horrible fevers and sweating I flipped through magazines to keep my mind off of the fact I had to be apart from our baby. I felt completely disgusting as I sat in bed with a huge incision and the “Infectious Disease Specialist” tried to figure out what exactly was wrong with me. Those magazines were filled with celebs that were being praised for being bikini clad 6 weeks post-partum. I realized that is not real life. It actually made me angry. I’m sure every woman (post-partum or not) would look like celebs if they had a personal trainer, nutritionist and probably a chef. I’m not saying that hardwork doesn’t pay off, but the results would be quicker if we could all live lives like that.
    I enjoy your blog because it’s for real people. Like you said, people are praised for getting quick results. I have always struggled with my weight. I’m 5’3″ with a pre-pregnancy weight of 250… Gross, I know. It wasn’t a lack of working out. My diet had been the issue. I was always active in figure skating, hockey and softball… Once I stopped participating in sports my weight shot up. The day I had Harlow I was 273 lbs. 1 week after birth I was 240. With the help of Weight Watchers, my husband and some old workout videos I’m now 229.
    I need an extra push towards my weight loss goals and your blog is exactly what I needed. Our daughter is the best thing that has happened to us but I don’t want to be the mom who has this convo:
    Me: “I’m still holding onto my baby weight”
    Friend: “Ohh that’s ok! How old is your baby?”
    Me: “6……”
    Haha! But seriously! Thank you for all of your tips, tricks and inspiration! We all appreciate it!!

  • Yuri says:

    I agree…and yet i´m going to be a little mean and criticize you on this one. I like your blog Cassey and I agree with everything you said. Yet, this coming from someone who already looks like a swimsuit model and someone who just get out of a drastic weightloss and training program….someone who has antecedents of…quite crazy diets,of no carbs allowed,not even fruit….. I´m not really convinced. If I were to look like Alessandra Ambrosio and say that I love my body whatever the shape and that woman shouldn´t worry so much about their siwmsuit body, would you really buy it? It´s easy to NOT OBSESS when you´re already there. But i don´t really see many normal to plus size woman who come out and send this exact message. We don´t need words,we need facts. We don´t really need Barbie to tell us how we should feel good in our body….we need a woman who doesn´t look like a Victoria´s Secret angel,doesn´t diet and workout 635 day a year and has some cellulite and other body imperfections, we want that woman to come and show us that you can feel great with your body.
    But I still appreciate the article and believe it´s an important message to send out there. I really hope you won´t take my comment badly as it was never meant to offend you personally:)

    • Abelle says:

      I don’t get why so many people think that just because someone looks a certain way that they’re immune to the societal pressure to be “perfect”. Women who are conventionally attractive and fit the media’s mold of what you’re “supposed” to look like can suffer just as much from body-image issues and all the emotional turmoil that goes on with that. Society teaches us, unfortunately, that we’re never good enough, no matter how we look: our our waists could always be smaller, our boobs could always be better/bigger, we could always have less cellulite, etc.

      I’m not trying to attack your comment or anything, but as someone who fits the basic criteria of whatever’s considered conventionally attractive today and has STILL suffered from some pretty severe issues with body/self-image, depression, and multiple brief bouts with disordered eating, I personally don’t think it matters where this message comes from as long as someone’s actually spreading it. We need women of every shape and size to spread the self-love message, because we’re all real women, no matter what society and the media tells us.

      • Janie says:

        thank you Abelle, I agree with everything you said. Especially your last line – “we’re all real women, no matter what society and the media tells us”. I am so tired of the shifty definition of ‘woman’ …whether curvy or slim and toned, ALL women are REAL women. We all experience struggles and frustrations and mixed messages and pressures no matter what we look like on the outside.

      • Yuri says:

        I agree… We need women OF EVERY SHAPE and SIZE. I can see now how my comment didn´t really hit the mark I wanted. I did not mean to say that if you´re thin or pretty you can´t suffer from body image or we don´t need you to tell us about loving your body.
        What i meant is that, for me at least….having YOU or anybody who lookgs gorgeaous telling ME how i should enjoy what i have….doesn´t help. Because i feel you´re saying it from the finish line while i´m grasping for air trying to reach you. But maybe that´s just me…. i´ve always been jealous of thinnie tiny girls and maybe that´s why i tend to react a bit too harsh. It´s not fair and I shouldn´t be like that, but you pretty and thin girls have something i never had or will have ;)) So i can at least be mean every now and then:)))

  • wendy says:

    A guy just told me that I’m chubby recently (even though I’m underweight) and i feel so pressured and sad. I was actually quite happy with my body, until he said that. Immediately, I wanted to lose 10 pounds. (Also, with the fact that in Asia, everybody is literally so skinny like sticks.. which gives me more pressure.) Thanks for writing this post. It really helped!

    • Sarah Lou says:

      Hope you’re better now! He has no right to judge you like that. I bet he wasn’t Mr Perfect himself. Prick.

  • Clare says:

    THIS is why I read your blog.
    Such an inspiration.
    Thank you, you dont realise how many lives you’re changing
    Love Clare x

  • Kat says:

    What a great post! In my younger years, definitely more pressure. And the media…yes, I agree there is a lot of blame there. I’ve explained it to my two daughters over the years (now 18 and 20) that most of those pics are photoshopped. When a woman’s waist is narrower than the width of her head, well it’s fake. From fake boobs, fake narrow waists, inner thigh gaps, to smooth, flawless skin. I often pointed out before and after photoshopped pics to illustrate this. What you see is not what you get. At least most of the time in the fashion industry.

    I’ve tried to counter the media onslaught over the years by being a role model for my kids. They’ve watched me work out at the gym since they were babies or toddlers through the playroom window and would say, “I can’t wait to work out with you, Mom!” And for the past four years, my family gym membership has been in full force :) . I’ve pointed out the discrepancies with media pics of what’s fake and what’s not, and I’ve repeated many times that the skinny, bony look is NOT sexy and not healthy. I think it has worked. None of my kids have food issues, and they are very motivated to eat healthy. We are not calorie obsessed, but concerned with portion sizing and healthy choices.

    Finding you and Tosca Reno over the past 18 mos. has rejuvenated our routines even more. My older daughter is eating super healthy (can be very hard as a college student) and loves to work out, and my younger daughter is often seen in her room doing POP Pilates via her cell phone lol. She likes to mix up her gym routine with Cassey Ho workouts :) . My boys are a work in progress, although my 15-year old son caught the “gym bug” last year and definitely eats healthier than most boys his age.

    We a family that is into hard, muscular bodies and healthy eating but not defined by numbers. We don’t weigh ourselves regularly, don’t own a scale, and our worth is not determined by our waist size. I can understand how some might find duality in your posts. However, fitness is your job. Your job is to look super fit and motivate us to work hard to achieve our fitness goals whatever they might be. Because of you, I’ve really cleaned up my eating plan and lost 16 lbs of fat since January! I feel great, look great, and never thought I’d see my high school weight again but here I am. It just melted off. And the best thing is, is that only one person out of so many can’t even tell I’ve lost weight. It came off from the right place–my belly, which is the most dangerous place to have fat as we get older. Okay, and a wee bit from my thighs.

    But ask me who was the primary motivator behind my new and improved eating plan? Cassey Ho, of course! As always, you rock!!!

    • amy q says:

      wow i wanna be a mom like you when i grow up! you guys are awesome :)

  • Francine says:

    Omg that comment with “im confused’ is not suppose tobe here!!!! Aarrggg mobiles.

    • Tanja says:

      Hahaha Francine looks like it describes you well :D

  • Lisa says:

    So true :D.
    Thank you, your positive attitude sooo lights up my day :-)

  • Francine says:

    Im confused…

  • Leanne says:

    Thanks for addressing this topic Cassey :) I so agree!! You should exercise to be healthy not to strive a bikini body — sure it can help as an extra motivation — but nothing more than that!

    I just started my own online business as a registered nutritionist to coach people to a healthy weight and I felt I had to have the perfect body in order to be able to coach others. I started obsessing on gaining 10 pounds and get more toned muscles. Instead of gaining weight I ate like an animal and exercised religiously but nothing happened. I was too focused on results, so it backfired on me.

    Since a few weeks I’ve let go of the thought of having to have “the perfect body” (whatever that may be…) in order to be a good example to my clients, and low and behold…. I’m gaining muscle & weight and my body hasn’t looked this good AND HEALTHY in a long time! :D

    Our mind is our most powerful “tool” – it can help us tremendously but it can get destructive as well.

    Feeling at peace with who you are & your body is a key component to a healthier, fitter and sexier YOU — at least that’s my believe ;)

    Love from Leanne!

  • Courtney says:

    Cassey, you rock! :) I love this post :D x

  • Charissa Wright says:

    Thankyou

  • Tanja says:

    This message is really needed nowadays in our society. But then again, last video series was all about getting a bikini body… I suppose the name is good for marketing (it attracts people’s attention when they’re browsing YT for pre-summer workouts) I’ve been your follower quite a long time but sometimes I find duality in your posts and the messages you give us (fb, videos…) and sometimes I think you also obsess about having such bod. Not accusing you – just assuming. We’re all victims of media, brainwashed. But as I said, this post was well intended and really needed. But as long media will keep doing what it’s doing it’s gonna be really hard to get rid of this influence and messages they’re giving. Do you feel pressurized? You didn’t mention anything about it. Thank you, always nicely written :)

    • Victoria says:

      “I find duality in your posts and the messages you give us (fb, videos…) and sometimes I think you also obsess about having such bod. ”

      I agree. Not trying to sound rude – I really admire you, Cassey, but it seems that ever since the competition you’ve been obsessed with your physical appearance.

      I think we’re all guilty of experiencing this at one point or another. I’ve struggled with body image for years now, and honestly, will most likely continue to for years to come. I hope that at some point I’m strong enough to overcome it, but as you said, it’s difficult when there are so many external influences encouraging us to have a certain body/certain weight range/etc. The media is truly obsessed with idealized body types. It’s stunting us, as a society, from being able to form our own concrete opinions and thoughts regarding body image. It’s hard to be confident in our bodies when the media is constantly saying, “No, look this way.” It’s sad. Seemingly every single magazine marketed toward women include a handful of weight-driven headlines on the cover, screaming at us, “Shrink your belly!” or “Drop 10 pounds!”

      It’s important to remember (and I have to continuously remind myself of this, too): our physical appearance is just one part of what makes us who we are and we should never let our entire self-worth come down to how we look/what we weigh/etc. We are MUCH more than that.

      Hope you’re living a healthy, happy lifestyle; please don’t obsess over your body.

      • Connie says:

        Agree with these posts. Coming from someone who has released an inner-thigh print out and has focused on a perfect bikini body, I am astounded of how people really think this is inspirational. There are people who genuinely feel this way, and others who will say this to try to reach out, seem like a nice person, but step onto the treadmill twice a day to get a bikini bod. I know you are part of the fitness industry, but you need to know that you’re part of this media pressure too. As a youtube guru, you are influencing many people as well, especially if your idea of pushing yourself is entering a bikini competition.

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