Being Called FAT. It hurts. And you don’t forget.

Hello POPsters,

Yesterday I announced the winners of the Kallisti Body chain. The winners were selected based on their thoughtful answers to “What makes you feel beautiful?” One entry that particularly touched me was Cari Garvey’s. She talked about how growing up people taunted her for her size and how she will never forget the hurt that she endured for being overweight.

Her story touched me because I know the hurt. I was once called fat. It was 13 years ago. I was at a family birthday party, we were all eating together at this long table with all sorts of wonderful foods laid out. I was thoroughly enjoying my plate along with my mom and sister. Then this little girl who was probably a year or two younger than me looks at me and says “Why are you so fat?”

I stopped chewing. My eyes welled up with tears. The edges of my lips curled and I fought the quivering frown overcoming my face. I dropped my fork. Ran into another room. Cried. The kind of crying where you can’t stop and you can’t breathe.

It wasn’t long before my mom chased after me and held me in her arms. She didn’t know what happened but she did try to calm me down. When I could finally catch my breathe to tell her, she laughed it off, saying that the little girl didn’t know anything and that she didn’t mean it. I eventually stopped crying. But it didn’t matter. Kids tell the truth. And the truth was, I was fat. I’ll never forget.

I was 11 years old at the time and chubby. In my yearbook pictures, I had a double chin when I smiled. It was hard to find jeans that fit me. But none of it had even bothered me up until that point. I didn’t even know I was fat. I was active, happy, doing well in school, and had friends. That was all that mattered. But from that point on, I became self conscious. I lost confidence. Body image then became something I was constantly aware of. My body dictated my feelings.

Luckily as I reached puberty, I naturally leaned out as I grew taller. In high school, I was on the Varsity tennis team for 4 years and didn’t ever have to think about working out. It was just part of my routine. I didn’t know much about nutrition either so I’d notice that I’d get skinny on season and gain weight off season/in the summer. One September when I got back to school one of my closest friends straight up told me “You look bigger.” I clearly remember defending myself, saying “No, it’s just the sweater, really I didn’t.” I begged her to understand. It was like I was fighting for skinny. It hurt so much. That was 8 years ago. I was 16.

I would say that from that conversation on, I began my struggle with body image satisfaction. No, I never had an eating disorder or anything, but I can confess that I am very hard on myself when I look in the mirror. I see things I wanna improve, just like any other girl. It’s a bad habit, but being the perfectionist that I am, the goals get harder and harder to reach every time.

Do you know that every time I put up a new video, I have this fear that one of the commenters will say “looks like you got fatter”? I don’t think it’s happened yet, but it’s bound to. I’ve lost definition and put on a few pounds since I moved back to the West Coast. Not gonna lie. I can envision this happening when I read the fat comment…I will freeze up, have chills run down my spine, and think back in detail to when I was 11.

Being called fat is something that is offensive and hurtful. It’s something I can forgive, but I cannot forget. Being called fat is a personal attack on your most vulnerable self. It’s a physical insult that leaves an emotional scar.

But like anything else, we must move on to continue growing. Where do you go from here? You begin by removing yourself from that person or the situation that is making you feel horrible. You are still amazing, regardless of what you look like. (Remember how content I was before that girl called me fat?) If you choose to change your physical appearance/lose weight, then do it with passion and know that you’re doing it for the right reasons. Confidence. Health. Fitness. Then enjoy the journey. Find happiness in your day to day struggles and happiness when you reach your destination. Life is too short to be sad over things like this. Just keep remembering that you are resilient and that you can conquer anything you put your mind to. You just need to want it badly enough.

QUESTION: Are you hurt when someone calls you fat? How did you feel and what did you do to make things better?

PS: I’m banning the word “fat” from my vocab, and you should too. That’s no way to describe a person.

Comments

  1. Everyone yur not fat yu just have fat so dont say those things cause then it doeant male yu feel better most of the time

  2. It actually does hurt being called fat!I remember last year when I was in primary school this guy whom used to be my “friend”.I acted like I didn’t care and I fought back.When I got home I cried and cried,My sister caught me crying and asked what was wrong.She comforted me and I felt ok.My mom used to give me lectures about loosing weight,I was about 9 or 10 then.I wasn’t that fat tbh,I was an average 9 year old.I felt like she hated me and it killed me to look at her anytime I woke up.Recently her and my dad told me that I have to cut down on some foods and all that.I have lost quite a good chunk of weight.After the said this I didn’t want to eat dinner.They told me why didn’t I come down for dinner and I said “I’m not hungry”,she said “but you haven’t eaten since breakfast”(all I had was green tea and a lemon slice).They started to feel sorry and they began to force me to eat
    I wouldn’t even drink a glass of water.Thats how bad it was getting.They don’t talk about weight anymore and have gotten soo supportive!I haven’t had any sugar today and I’m really proud :) xxx don’t ever call anyone FAT it’s worse then a punch!

  3. Danielle says:

    My boyfriend called me ugly and fat yesterday. He’s called me fat before but yesterday he said I’m getting bigger. He said “your still young, you need to go excersize or else in 3-4 years your gonna get 300-400 pounds.” I’m only 17, I have a 6 month ol baby. His dad won’t watch him long enough for me to even take a hour jog or walk. It’s to hot to have a little baby out in the heat for an hour, plus he doesn’t like his stroller to much so most likely I will carry him the whole time. I can’t lose waight just like that. What my boyfriend doesn’t know is I have struggled with my weight my whole life. I’ve been called fat ugly for sure, all the time. But i learned to cope with it just because I was use to it. But I’m not use to being called fat and ugly by the love of my life. I mean he doesn’t call me beautiful anymore he literally calls me ugly and tells me I’ve ” gained some weight”. I’m so hurt. I don’t know how to cope, I’ve been with him for almost 2 years and he’s never made me feel this way about myself. I love him a lot, he’s the father of my baby. But I don’t know what to do. He’s clearly not happy with me anymore because of my appearance and I am defiantly not happy with him making me feel ugly and highly self conscious. I’m balling my eyes out. I’ve never hated myself so much. I’m afraid to eat. When I see myself in the mirror all I see is a fat cow and I get disgusted. I hate myself.

  4. I have been called fat a few times and it still hurts to be called fat because Im 12 I’m 5’3 and I have big thigh which I hat but I been exercising to lose thigh and stomach but today I have been called fat by my father few time and it hurts me by that. So sometime I would eat little food or nothing at all he time me that I’m just going to eat one piece of chicken today and I did argue cause that wasn’t good for my health but now I feel better about myself cuz I learned to love mybody no matter what

  5. Being fat really does hurt, I’m glad someone has experience what I did/am. I’m 15 and ever since I was 12 my family has always called me fat. Mostly my mom and grandma. My dad used to a little but he stopped. The thing that hurts the most is that they call me fat, but they know I’m working on my weight. I’m not that fat. I have big boobs, rather skinny waist, with a big butt(thanks squats!). Anyways I am trying to work on my weight and I’m doing the best I can but all they do is call me fat and it doesn’t motivate me, it depresses me. It does make me work harder , it makes me hate me look in the mirror even if I lose 20 pounds, all I will see is that girl who my family has been calling fat for years. I hate it so much . I have an older sister who is has a body like me but my family doesn’t say anything about her weight to her. Nothing. It’s just me. My mom isn’t that skinny, she has weight too but she always picks on me. I’ve grown the hate the girl in the mirror. If I lose 10 pounds, 50 pounds, or even 100, I will always see myself has the fat girl

  6. Ok. So I am apparently not alone out there. I am 53 years old and I read so many of the heart breaking accounts from young girls and women out there. To this day I am very over weight and I too have struggled with this all my life. Every time someone makes a fat joke, a fat comment, I try to not let it sting. Today I was at a family get-together for a family members graduation brunch. High school can be a rough time and a comment, not directed at me, but said by the high school senior that had just graduated, “I hate fat people.” For whatever reason it was said, though again, not directed at me it hurt. The reason it hurt is because after it was said, they realized what they said, and they glanced at me. I pretended I didn’t hear, but I did. Still hurts, still stings just like ions ago when I was in school. This “fat” thing has left me with virtually no self-esteem and cynical. Please watch what you say, you never know who is listening.

  7. my heart is breaking in two says:

    i am in my twenties and it still hurts when people call me fat. for the last couple weeks my brother been calling me fat and my family say that i lost lots of money and time trying to lose weight and that i will die fat because i will never lose weight. it huts me so much. i have been spending lots of time in my room to avoid people because i feel safe when i am alone without anyone calling me fat and worthless. i have bad thoughts because of the worlds that my family tell me. it has made me hate them so much that i just want to move and it is very hard for me to sit down with them and actually have a conversation. for this reason i keep myself locked in my room so that no one can see me. so i know how people feel when it comes to being called fat. it kills me inside and sometimes i dont know what to do about it but cry my heart out.

  8. This article was tough for me to read, but necessary. Thank you so much for posting.

    All my life, it has felt like my family has made it their duty to remind me how fat I am. It’s to the point where I’m not even sure what I look like anymore, I just feel like a product of what everyone tells me I am.

    One of my earliest memories of this was at the Thanksgiving table, probably when I was around 5 or 6. I reached for a piece of turkey and my grandmother swiftly swatted it out of my hand, telling my parents that I was chubby and “didn’t need any more food”. I was hungry and eventually cried. My mother took me into the next room just so that I could eat a piece of bread.

    Then in my latter years it was my father. Constantly telling me I “could stand to lose 10 pounds”. I never developed an eating disorder, but I developed an unhealthy mentality towards food. I’d go on insane diet and exercise kicks out of sheer panic for what my parents or my grandmother might think, and then inevitably relapse into a giant pile of chocolate and/or fried chicken.

    I guess what I’m trying to say is this: all my life I’ve tried and failed with controlling my weight, getting healthy ,getting in shape. I just want to feel strong and have energy and feel good about myself. Do you have any advice for how to get on track? How do you keep all the negativity out while trying to focus on yourself?

  9. A Hurt School Girl says:

    This article was very hard to read because I feel like someday the same would happen for me… I’ve been called fat several times and it hurts so much, on the outside I look tough I say everything is ok but as soon as I get home I lock my doors and cry in my bathroom. My own family also insults me and tells me that I’m fat all the time. Today I was calledft again, this guy asked everyone “where are u from?” I said I’m from a mythical place I might be a dragon or a fairy as a joke and he just murmured under his breath “an overweight fairy who can’t fly” to be honest inside I felt like I was going to explode into tears! I know I’m fat I don’t needs to be told that! I’m starving myself and I have nobody to talk to abou this… This article really helped me… Thanks for reading

    • Hey Hurt girl, I’m sitting here helping a friend who just got called fat too. Been called it myself a lot as well. Usually by boys who are dumb. Don’t let any dumb boy determine your happiness. Get a good comeback line like “ohhh, bullying, I see you’re finally good at something” and walk away. Then for goodness sake, go talk to someone about it!!!! If you are feeling like exploding and starving yourself, you definitely need someone to talk to. Kids help phone, a friend, a nurse, a cousellor, a teacher, a mom, anyone!! Don’t keep it bottled up inside because then you will eventually become really unhappy. Oh yeah, and tell family member how you feel. They likely think they are kidding and it doesn’t bother you (because you never show it). They need to know that you are hurting inside. And if your family happens to be full of dumb boys….good luck! Never let anyone decide how to feel about yourself. And remember, people bully because they are hurting inside too. Maybe the boy is feeling down about himself because he just read this blog and I called him dumb…sorry boy…or maybe he has zits or sucks at math. Who knows? but he puts down other people as a way to make himself feel better. It might help you to know that and maybe next time you see him, be super kind, give him a compliment. Maybe it will fill his bucket so he stops being so darn mean. Go girl!

  10. I just got bullied at school today i was walking to the bathroom with my friends we walked inside and 3 other girls from my class
    We’re in there 2 of them i was friends with but 1 im not so all of a sudden she starts saying Macayla you talk to much i just ignored her ,2 other girls walked in whom I don’t know and the bully Mekka called me
    Fat the 2 other people who i don’t know started saying dont say that!and the other 2 girls were saying calm down Mekka!my 2 best friends were saying are you alright i said yes lieng and hid my tears.Then i left and my 2 BESTIES came to one of my BESTIES was friends with the bully but not anymore .I went back to home and did not say anything.i dont know if i should tell my dad plz help-10 year old

  11. I’m called fat a lot… It really does hurt and I cant ignore it. Sometimes I just wish I could die and I’m trying so hard to be good enough for everybody. Yes, I do cut and yes I am suicidal. Being called fat is one of the things I’m called. Also for the question I feel like bursting into tears whenever I”m called fat also nothing ever makes things better it just floats in my mind reminding me everyday that I AM FAT… Anyways that’s my story…. Bye now!

    • Daniela, Oh sweetheart, I am so sorry that someone is using words to hurt you. Name calling is really just a way to make another person feel better when they don’t feel very good about themselves. I know it seems like people that name call are powerful, and popular…but, that changes. Daniela, you were made with a purpose. Some of the most beautiful women I know are not SKINNY. Please don’t think being fat or being called fat defines you. Listen, you have taste buds for a reason! It’s OK that you eat. Do not stop eating. Take a paper plate and create 4 parts…write one of these topics on each part…relationships, spiritual, exercise, and food. Color in each piece of the pie according to how “good” it is. Then, write down what you can do to make yourself feel better in any of those areas. Being healthy is the most important, and that includes being kind. The people that are name calling are UNHEALTHY. Don;t strive to be like them. You don’t need to ignore those people, you just need to fill your life up with so much good stuff that you can’t hear them anymore. :) xo

  12. Eva Heyward says:

    I was called fat today by a group of girls I try my hardest to think postive about my weight but this really hurt. They said I looked like Theodore and I’m goofy I know I’m really stupid and I don’t want them to think I’m upset and give them the satisfaction. I am so upset, I don’t know what to do but this article really helped. Thankyou

    • Eva Heyward says:

      What’s the point in life

      • Hey girl! To answer your question, I think the point in life for you right now is to reflect if you believe what those girls said is really true. It seems as if you’re really sad and I think this is an opportunity to prove them wrong. They’ll be satisfied if you harm yourself. Ignore anyone who calls you such names but if you feel there is something wrong with your weight, you should work for it! This is coming from my personal weight loss story as well :) I was never called fat but I was definitely overweight and losing weight for two years was one of the greatest decisions I’ve ever made. I’ve actually lost a little more than 20 pounds–who knew?! So anyways, I don’t think you should let what those girls said eat you up inside, but if you’re still upset, it’s probably because you believe them. The best advice I have for you is to ignore the motherf*cking haters and make healthier choices ONLY if you personally feel you should. Hope this helps! And remember–the POPsters are always here for you! <3

  13. This article made me sad. I think there’s a lot worse things in the world you could be than fat. No one should feel like they have to lose weight over some thoughtless comment. I’ve never been overweight and I’ve been called fat, and I’m now struggling to recover from an eating disorder. The people passing rude comments are the ones that need to change, not you because of their unwarranted opinions. It’s much better to look chubby and be healthy and happy than to lose weight because you don’t meet the standards of someone who would say hurtful things to you. Maybe they’re saying it because they feel bad about themselves, hurt people hurt people, rise above it.
    “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”

  14. when I was younger my brothers wrote a song about me called “YOU EAT LIKE A PIG” the will sing it to me everytime I eat :’( it hurt so bad

  15. My sister got the habit of calling me fat from our father. I even thought about committing suicide on her birthday. “surprise, you don’t have to feel ashamed of being related to me anymore.” I’ve decided to remove her from my life, but I’m the bad guy for doing so. People talk about how you’re supposed to remove poisonous people from your life so why does that rule change because she’s family?

    • I’m so sorry for what your sister put you through! That sounds awful :( No one deserves that kind of treatment, and just remember to smile; you are beautiful! (You are right to try and avoid her- you shouldn’t have to put up with that crap.)
      I used to be very skinny as a child, but since middle school, I’ve put on some weight. I’m average for my height, (I’m 15 years old, 118 pounds at 5’4 and I’m an ectomorph) but my family (especially my little brother) makes fat jokes. They used to bother me a lot, but now, I deal with it by telling them that I’m not fat- I’m just big boned. (Or during Christmas, I told them I wasn’t fat, I’m festively plump xD)
      I find that it’s so much easier to make a joke out of it and make them laugh. It shows everyone that I’m not bothered and that I really don’t care. In that sense, the atmosphere suddenly becomes friendlier and the joking doesn’t feel like it’s really intended to hurt me anymore as I am laughing with them! (And my “I’m not fat, I’m-” jokes are pretty hilarious :))
      Anyway, I completely understand that it’s so hurtful and unkind when people try to put you down- but don’t let them get to you! Chin up, gurl! :) We’re here for you, and you’re absolutely beautiful!

  16. Im 4’11 and weigh 113 and short for my age so im more compact and i hate it people who dont know me will say i am and it really does hurt. It encourages me to work harder to prove them wrog and laugj in their face when im in better shape. People are NOT fat they jusy have extra fat no one should be described as fat

    • hi everyone my name is Sophie in confidence I am going to tell u my story x I had a boyfriend called Reuben it was stupid of me to go out with him I thought he was nice I was wronge … I dumped him and since then he has been calling me ugly fat a sket a slag dumb and a geek I cant take it anymore !!!I cant help the way I am I no im not the hottest girl n the world but im definatly not fat far from it not really that ugly im a bit of a slag I suppose I walk around with short skirts full make up extensions ect but anyway don’t let people bring u down for who u r u need to be proud of who u r be proud to be different :) bye for now

  17. I had always been as thin as a rail. That is until I gave birth to my son and I ballooned. Even though I am not overweight, people still call me fat because they might be comparing me to my old self. I am a size 10 now. I do not mind being told that I gained weight or i got bigger but what i dont appreciate is the fat jokes….people throwing jokes as if they own me or had the slightest bit of idea what im going through. My father in law told me he’d ask someone to kidnap me and hide me from the world for 6 months until I lose the weight
    Or that since I am going to be a lawyer I should trim down or no one would hire me. Sometimes it hurts that all the good things you accomplished go down the drain just because you have a bit of unwanted flab somewhere. I hate living in a world where you are nothing when youre not thin.

    • Jammiedodger says:

      I’m in school still and people compare me to a chipmunk and call me fat saying I’m storing for the winter even though winters ending it hurts I try to just brush it off but it hearts each time it feels like someone’s stabbed you in the heart I have had a medical condition to do with my weight and I’m recovering but every time people call me fat I feel like I wanna be anerexic just to prove them wrong but I that’s bad so I won’t but it just hurts so bad I feel like they have put a tag on me that I can’t shake off they wind me up cause they know I’m not quick enough to get my stuff back when they take It it’s hard but as people who are called fat or overweight we’ll muddle through don’t worry

  18. I just suddenly been overwhelmed with a horrible feeling. I’m not overweight, but I’m not entirely happy with how I look.
    so for the past 3 months i’ve been eating better and improving myself and I’m really getting a vibe from it. But I’m broken down to the bottom again. This girl i know, out of NOWHERE in our conversation, decided to tell me I look fatter. Why? the F? I don’t understand her reason. It’s getting on my nerves so much now, because she’s not even fat and she always complains that she’ll get fat. These people seriously get annoying. So even though I work so hard, she doesn’t give a damn about what I’d feel if she tells me that. So I told her that was mean and she covered it up with a halfas*ed excuse about my muscles or something. It’s so offensive. You’re honestly right, cassie. Fat and whatever you want to call someone with a little bit of extra weight is not right and I’m definitely changing the way I feel about this person. Her warped sense of beauty. I honestly don’t even know anymore. I don’t know what to do.
    I should just forget about it andd forgive her but its hard and I don’t know. I just can’t believe she’s so selfish. I can’t believe it at all.
    and it hurts.

    • Gurl, as hard as it is, feel sorry for that poor girl who was unkind to you! She’s clearly jealous, and I know it’s tough, but if she says anything, just give her a condescending smile and brush it off. Some people try to put you down because they’re so jealous of how beautiful you are, and those people are just not worth it!! :)
      I sincerely hope that my words offer you solace, but I know how hard it is to feel broken and hopeless. I’ve been through it before, and I really felt like I wanted to die. But you know what? Those rude, jealous, and immature people would just win. What better way is there to get back at them than to hold your head high, keep striving to better yourself and achieve your goals, and look beautiful & fabulous?
      Chin up, gurl! :) We’re all in this together, and we’ll all support you! Just like anyone else reading this post, you’re beautiful and let no-one ever tell you otherwise!

  19. One day when i was 13 my dad was driving me home from a doctor’s appointment and i asked him if we could go for coffee and he said….
    “no, we cant. You heard what the doctor said about your weight”
    “but dad….the doctor didn’t say ANYTHING about my weight”
    “that’s only because your SO FAT that the doctor didn’t even want to mention it.”
    This made me cry, but he didnt ever apologize.

    • Okay what the hell?! I’ve been scrolling through these comments and feeling sad, but this is the only one that has made me want to stop and comment. That is awful, and it’s called psychological abuse. Annie, I hope you know that is NOT right, and is not what a father should even THINK of saying. If he does this on a regular basis, you really need to cut him out of your life, like Ashe did to her sister above, and you should consult a counselor, because that is literally abuse. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.

  20. Well, the truth hurts.
    My mother, up intil recently had not missed a day at the gym since I was born. 20 years and going strong. So needless to say, my family is in pretty good shape. Me? I work out 5 times a week, and take my supplements to look better.
    I have never been called fat. That’s cause I’ve never been fat I suppose, but I know the feeling. I’ve always had a small frame, so gaining muscle was always difficult for me. All the girls always thought I was supper skinny which sucked considering how much work I put into getting bigger.
    Different problem, yet the same complex.
    HOWEVER, I appreciate the criticism. Over the years the hard work has payed off, but I always do appreciate it when someone tells me I’ve lost muscle, or gained fat, or neglected to workout my legs so now I have toothpick legs.
    Criticism hurts, but it’s good to recieve it. If you’re fat, and know because someone told you, far from being offended you should be thankful. Thankful that someone cares enough to be honest with you. Get up and do something about it rather than crying at home.

    • You are joking, aren’t you? I am overweight. I gained 60 lbs after my son died because I could not handle the loss. Relatives have called me fat and it hurts. I know I need to lose weight and am working on that in my own time. What I do not need is commentary or personal attacks by people who are supposed to love and support me. I appreciate it when people notice that I am healthier, however I do not need to be torn down to motivate me. It hurts me very much and I wish they would stop tearing me down and take a moment to look in the mirror. We are all flawed.

    • RAY, get the F&5K out of this page! Idiot

    • You should be thankful that people call you fat? We all know that we’re fat because of people like you and the rest of society labeling and ridiculing us. For most of my life, I was blessed to have a decent metabolism. I considered myself average in weight, not model skinny. I was happy with my size but my own mother and grandmother would constantly critique my body. In the past three years I fell into deep depression and gained 60 pounds in one year. And you know what I got? Instead of a mother who would support me and encourage me to overcome my depression, she would brush it off as me making things up to get attention and then criticize me for how fat I looked EVERY DAY. And I should be THANKFUL for that?! I hit my rock bottom and was struggling to recover while my own mother and grandmother continued to bring me down and ridicule my body image and I should be THANKFUL?! I needed help, a hand to reach out and tell me that things would get better and that I would be able to overcome this. I needed a friend who would support my goal to losing weight and commended on my hard work for trying to take back control of my life. I never got that. All I got was society critiquing my body image. There is nothing to be thankful for. I am recovering from depression because I want to take back control and be happy again. Telling me how awful I look and saying that I look like I’m a pregnant woman is not motivational. It is degrading. People like you should be ashamed to even think those tactics work on a person’s psyche. You’re no better than those magazines and public media who constantly bring down people.

    • When I was living in Japan, all my friends and students there said it is normal to tell someone when they are starting to look fat. They think it’s helpful, and that not telling someone that they should lose weight is being a bad friend.

      I don’t like it. As a kid I was called fat by my immediate family members, even though I wasn’t fat. I just matured faster and was thicker than most other girls my age (I’m actually the smallest person in my immediate family). I feel I am a pretty strong and energetic person, even more so when I was younger. But I felt like I was emotionally scarred into believing I was fat and obsessed over my body so much that it’s affecting me majorly as an adult. I’m just starting to realize I have an eating disorder.

  21. Being called fat can hurt you, when I was growing up my brothers wrote a song about me being fat and eating like a pig :(

  22. My boyfriend told me the other day that he thought I wasn’t as “in shape” as I used to be. He hesitated long enough to think of the words, that clearly he was thinking of a “nice” way to say I’ve gained weight. I am by no means fat, or skinny. I’ve always been pretty active and naturally athletic and muscular. But never thin. I’ve had pretty great confidence and self esteem. But the past couple boyfriends (and really good looking friends) have slowly made that harder. When my boyfriend told me that, I felt like it broke me. The one person in my life that I thought, thought of me beautiful no matter what…. well I don’t believe him now. I can’t believe him. I look in a mirror and see every single flaw, every extra pound. I can’t imagine how to be naked in front of him now. I love him and he’s the man I want to be with for the rest of my life, and he says the same about me. But clearly physical attraction is important to him. What if some day I’m in an accident and no longer am “pretty?” I could have a stroke, or get caught in a fire! What will he think when I’m pregnant? How can I trust that he won’t leave me someday for a prettier, more fit person? How do I get past this?!

  23. I am 27 years old , 5’8 and weigh 240 lbs. I been fat all my life. I don’t even eat in front of my dad because it grosses him out. My mom calls me fat everyday too. I was the only sister of 4 who was always overweight. My scheduling manager’s kid even called me fat. I heard him tell his mother that girl is so fat I fell in love with one guy and he broke up with me, I took it so hard because I truly feel like he was the only guy who would love a girl my size. There is no way I will ever have a gorgeous man who will be okay with my fat self. I wish I could say I starve myself but its too hard. I truly dislike myself. I feel like growing up I was seen as the ugly, dark-skinned, dumb and FAT sister. My other sisters are nurses and pharmacists and I guess my parents never really cared about my education, I remember them always saying I never study, and that what I am taking in university was a waste of time. I tried so hard, so hard to make them be proud of me too. Ran home everytime I did well on a test just to prove that I wasn’t dumb and smart as my sister and maybe they could talk about me to their friends. Anyway, I realized my parents didn’t really care for my education so I majored in whatever I wanted, til this day after graduation if you asked my folks what my major was they couldn’t tell you. Have no clue.

    • god, you know… I get it. I really f’in get that. and it sucks. the only thing worse than not having the support of your parents is not feeling the support you yourself.

      As someone who has been drastically overweight… health endangering overweight…. it is a day by day, month by month situation. It hurts. It’s always going to hurt but when you choose to ignore and focus on your progress could be the best day of your life. GO Nima. GOOOOO!!!!! GO out and do great things and feel wonderful about yourself because that is who you are. I really believe than.. Forget ignorance and just be in your success. You are not you because of your size. You are you because of your fight and power and strength. I’m not even bullshitting. I really, genuinely believe in your ability. And Cassey believes in you. She is so positve how can you even handle that?! You are you and you are beautiful. Please, please, please use your self awareness to make the world a better place. xx

  24. I’m called fat alot. It hurts. Since 3rd grade my self-esteem has gone from high to none at all. I can forgive but I can’t forget. It really hurts. Some days I just come home and cry. I don’t think some people really think before they call you names. They just do it but either way it still hurts. I have lots of friends and I do well in school but emotionally I’m broken. Some days I don’t even want to go to school cuz I don’t know if someone’s going to call me fat or not. My brother even called me fat. One time he got mad at me and he told me to move out the way “with my fat self”. I’m just… Tired of it all. Even my best friend called me fat. She was like ur so fat and I know she didn’t mean it cuz she was laughing but it still hurts. Sometimes I can laugh it off but other times I walk away or go in the bathroom to cry.

  25. hurted girl says:

    Im called fat everyday and I Cry alot my sisters call me fat and my dad and people in the street and it hurts very much I was out from half an hour and then I was standing these 2 guys were talking about my size then I went home and I cant forget it :’( my sisters talk about my size infront of ppl and I feeeell embarressed and I want to cry till now

    • sparkle2290 says:

      my mom dad, sister all call me fat. my sister lost her charger and she blamed it on me i said “no i didnt! i didnt i didnt!” she said “YES U DO!” i asked “WHY WOULD I LOOSE IT?” she said “YOUR FAT! UR SO FAT” and i started crying soo much and i still am.
      like 1/2 a year ago when she was nicer to me i told her how much it hurts me when people call mee fat. i tell her i cry every time. i tell her i think of suicide way too much, i told her i even tried it once i told her i have cut. i have about twice but my sister finds out and says “WHY U CUTTING FATTY? IT WONT MAKE U SKINNIER” so i just scratch my legs really hard. im 12 and my sisters 16. she told me how she sometimes is called fat and doesnt like it but shes pretty skinny and i dont want to use anything she told me against her and i begged her just now if she could stop using it against me i was in tears asking and she said “GO AWAY U FAT SLUT” it seems like people arnt judged by their kindness or how they are on the inside….people are judgd if they are fat or skinny. if ur skinny ur perfect and if ur fat ur an ugly beast

  26. I get called fat by my step brother step sister and 13 year old step sister she calls me stretch marks but it’s not my fault my grandmother used to feed me a lot when I was younger and she thought it was cute but now I cry. My steps even called me these things today and I also get called fat from some boys and girls but honestly I’m chubby not fat I don’t understand why the girls and boys pick on me when there is gigantic girls in my school unless they like me or want a reaction out of me so yeah here is my everyday life by the way I’m 12 years old

    • right im 15 ive had it to but whats that thing what pweople say words dont brake somthig but trust it dose but not being funny but get over it ive had a lot of people trying to kill her self but it didnt work i talked her self out of it and it is just over a stupid word and if u dont like it then get help or do working out please dont just watch ur self get hart fight for your self x

    • Oh my goodness, you poor dear. :( Keep your head up high, and I know it’s hard, but don’t let those people bother you! You are BEAUTIFUL! :) Smile! :) Those rude and immature people are just so jelly (jealous) because you’re so pretty, so they feel the need to put you down. I’ve seen the prettiest girls sobbing their hearts out because they’ve felt so broken by the hurtful things people say, but they didn’t realize that people were just jealous and were trying to hurt them! I think that’s what is happening to you. So every time someone says something nasty, just remember that they’re just jealous of your beauty. :) No one can take that away from you, and don’t let them! :D Smile everyday and be happy, Alexis! xoxo

  27. It’s so weird… I was chubby when I was 8, and I was pretty fat when I was in my mid 20s. For some reason, I was NEVER bothered when people call me fat. I remember one of my good friend yelled out to me saying “Fat bxxxh!” (we call each other names like ahole so the b* word didn’t bother me, though nor the fat part). And a lot of friends during my fat period told me I have gotten so fat.

    I had a friend asked me “What the hell happened to you?? What did you do?? Gotten so dxmn fat!!”
    And my answer was ” *laughs* Lol, nothing! That’s probably why! Well most of the activities that I do is sit, and I work an office job.”

    Not sure why, I actually feel strange that so many people are bothered by it, but that I actually don’t. I didn’t care that I was fat, and I knew I was fat, but I was happy. People calling me fat was the same as people telling me I am a girl, telling me a fact, or people telling me hey your hair has gotten longer.

    I did lose a lot of weight later however, due to me wanting to present myself better.

    I think, lose weight for yourself if you feel bad about it, whether it’s because people bluntly tells you a fact, or it’s because of your health, or you feel that you don’t look good. If you feel healthy and happy about your image, it doesn’t matter what others say, someone telling you you have gotten bigger is no difference from someone saying your hair has grown longer, just tell them :”ya, I know. I am happy the way I am though.”

  28. anonymus says:

    I was called fat today by one of my friends. It bothered me because she did it with two people present during lunch time. I felt so embarrassed that i barely ate and on top of that she said that i didn’t eat because she had offended me. I just wished she would of pulled me to the side and told me.

  29. i haven’t eaten lunch in a month

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