Sad about how my last post came off as Eating Disordered

Hey guys,

So this is going to be a feeling post. A really long one.

I get scared when I write feeling posts because when I just say or type what I am honestly feeling I tend to get a lot of mail saying how I should censor what I say. Or take a step back and ask myself if I problem. Or how I am being disrespectful to someone. Or someone’s higher being. (“Don’t say OMG!”)

Ugh.

I’m not feeling so great right now. In fact, I am tearing up as I write this.

I don’t mean to attack anyone in this post, ok? Just wanna say that off the bat. I love you all. But below are my thoughts on some recent “attacks” that made me really sad:

I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately, reading some comments (on here,facebookyoutubetwitter) and as hard as I try not to, I take them personally. Very personally. I care about what you guys think. You shape me to be a better blogger but sometimes it’s hard for me to hear some things. Especially when it’s a callout that doesn’t align with my healthy living philosophy. The heathy philosophies that I work hard to cultivate daily and share with you all.

I feel like recently there’s been a lot of ED talk going on. How my Inner Thigh Gap printable workout should have been named better. How it could have triggered someone. How checking progress in the mirror is ED’d. How my definition of healthy is really just being skinny as possible. How I am just obsessed with working out and that’s all I do.

Then there’s the food attacks. You shouldn’t eat dairy. You shouldn’t eat soy. What’s wrong with meat? Why are you drinking so much water? Peanuts are really bad for you. Only ignorant people use SplendaHow dare you share this information with people.

Let’s not forget that some people think I’m fat. Others yell that I want to tone up. My hairs too long. I should cut it. Why teach a butt workout when you don’t have a butt. Is your arm broken? Your makeup is horrible.

The physical comments hurt, but not nearly to the degree that food attacks and ED-related stuff can sting.

On addressing the food comments: First of all, I am not a licensed nutritionist or registered dietician. I don’t know everything. I read books. I read articles. I read blogs. I try my best to gather information as accurately as possible before I say something. I am learning new things every day.

For the record, I am NOT on some crazy low cal diet that is comprised of whey protein and miracle noodles only. And I do not advocate eating as little calories as possible! How much do I eat a day? Probably somewhere around1800 calories. That’s probably a lot more than what a lot of you trying to lose weight are eating. It’s a balance of fats, carbs, and proteins mostly from whole, natural, and unprocessed foods. I eat to workout hard to build muscle to burn fat.

On addressing the workout obsession comments: Second of all, working out is not the only thing I do. Yes and I love it and that’s really all I talk about on here because it’s a fitness blog. I think you all come here to maybe get a little motivation, find a new workout, and get tips on how to work towards your dream body? Right? I feel comfortable giving fitness tips because I am a fitness professional. I don’t get attacks in this arena but I get irked when it comes off as me being obsessive.

I don’t write about my designing, my friends, my love life, my affinity for dogs, dancing, and trivia nights because it’s not what you come here for. Or do you?

I was really sad and upset when I read that someone felt that my thoughts were eating disordered and that my definition of healthy was being skinny. It was like a bullet to the heart. My blog is ABOUT healthy living. I try MY BEST to be a good healthy living blogger…and (sigh)…the message that I hope gets across is that being healthy means being strong and fit to do the things you love.

You know how sometimes you THINK something and you know it totally WRONG or POLITICALLY INCORRECT but you’re totally aware of it? To me it’s ok to have those thoughts once in a while. I mean who’s mind is pristine all the time? Well the problems begin when you decide to share those thoughts. It’s even worse when you share them publicly. I guess that was the problem with my mirror-checking habit from yesterday’s post on motivation. I know it sounds crazy but I shared anyway because I thought it’d be relatable to other women.

On addressing my desire to tone up: I am aware of what I eat and how I workout because YES I AM trying to lose fat. And I’m serious about it. I’ve got to be if I want results. If I were at maintenance I wouldn’t be so critical. But why Cassey are you trying to lose weight?

I said this before, but you new ones may not have read it. I‘ve always been in control of my life. My grades. My passions. My entrepreneurial ventures. I’ve always been able to figure out the tricks and the formulas. But there’s one thing that I couldn’t really figure out how to get a hold of. And that’s my body.I’m not saying I hate my body or that it’s not good enough. I’m saying that I want to figure out the formula for me. The formula that will allow me to know what works for me and what doesn’t. I’m still writing the equation.

I like challenges and I like achieving goals. I’m considered healthy and fit by most people that see me. So why not stop there? I must have a body image disorder. Why not just be happy with where I am now? I must have major psychological insecurities. I am a perfectionist and an over-achiever at heart. It’s a bad thing sometimes. But it’s helped me push harder and harder in life and do things I never thought I could do.

It’s no different with my physical activity and my body. Maybe I want to compete in a fitness bikini competition one day. Not to win or anything. Just to do it. Much like how I ran my first half marathon to try something new, but not to get a medal. I wanna know how to get there. I just wanna do it. It’s not a goal for a lot of people, but I’ve considered it. I admire the ladies who can lift super heavy and show up the men in the weight room. All I want is to be able to know how to get there. Then I can share with you guys what I learned.

Man, I don’t even know what I just wrote. Just a lot of bla bla bla.

Bottom line – I hope that through watching my videos and doing my workouts, you get that I am about balanced health and fitness. If it doesn’t come off as that, well wow, I must have an ED I didn’t even know about.

Anyway, I genuinely wanna thank all of you who did write me, comment, and call out any of the above mentions. Even though it hurts to hear those things, you took your time to share with me your thoughts and I APPRECIATE THAT. It means you’re paying attention where maybe I didn’t. You make me more aware of my blogger responsibility.

This blog and community are one big conversation. Open forum. Always speak up. I love reading your comments. Even if it makes me cry.

Thanks and love you all. Going to bed now.

Thoughts for me?

Comments

  1. Cassey, you are amazing and beautiful, andso kind-hearted. You are an inspiration to me and so many others. I want you to know that my mum is a well known health journalist and she loves everything you stand for. Nutritional or otherwise. We both enjoy doing your videos so much! If my mum thinks what you’re saying is fine, then you must be doing alright!
    Lots of love
    Joely

  2. Not to be bad but having looked your blog and your app – especially the before and after photos girls post (not to say you are responsible for this part) – I was actually beginning to wonder whether you were promoting eating disorders. I find it pretty weird how your recipes and meals revolve around eating protein, protein, protein. Our muscles burn fuel in form of glucose (or fat) for energy. Moreover, glucose is imperative for optimal brain function -which is why people get tired or irritable when they go on high protein or high fat and zero carb diets. Another thing is excessive consumption of proteins longterm is actually bad for you. It will drive your body into a state called KETOSIS where it’s main source of energy becomes protein. Your kidneys will have to work twice as hard to eliminate the excess protein your body is excreting because it doesn’t need. I get that the point is to try to train your muscle to burn fat and preserve muscle which I think you do by consuming protein powder but I dont know if you have considered the long term effects this kind of diet will have on your system. I’m not stating that your diet is wrong-but the problem with it is that it encourages people to go on it long term-which I’m afraid to say is detrimental to health. As a Dr, I can also tell you that going on such diets long term increases the risk of bone fractures and kidney stones and I’m sure you don’t want that!
    Ketogenic (high protein) diets are suitable IN THE SHORT TERM for diabetics and people struggling with excessive weight loss. Other than that, you need to stress to your readers that the diet is NOT suitable for diabetics. Some young diabetics out there may not be aware of the dangers associated with following such a high protein-low carb diet for so long! People who are unable to secrete basal insulin, such as type 1 diabetics and long-term type II diabetics, are liable to enter an unsafe level of ketosis, causing an eventual comatose state that requires emergency medical treatment. Please please please replace or modify your recipes with something more suitable. I know you say you are not promoting an eating disorder but when I read your posts on thigh gaps, pinching yourself in front of the mirror and being so obsessed about protein all the time, I WORRY.

    Feel free to post/not post but I think this is food for thought! x

  3. My comments never get approved:(. I was only giving my honest, supportive opinion which was I was I totally loved this vid and din’t think it it came off as eating disordered. Oh well. It was much longer than this… what did I say that was off?

  4. Cassey dont listen to them, they are just jelous of you and your amazing body

  5. Little late but…
    all I wanted to say is that for me you Cassie and most of the people on the blogilates community are inspiration not for the weight loss but for the body makeover. What I mean is that sometimes in some photos, especially now with the app, you can see how people look toned without even losen any pound. And I think that everyone really wants to look better all the time. That is the main reason people dress up to go out, wear make up. It don’t mean you don’t love yourself, it means you want to look your best. And lets admit it poblably no one look their best on baggy pijamas, messy hair, and eye bags. Well, no one look their best with a belly pouch. It doesn’t matter if you are a size 2 or a 13. You can be a size 13, 14 or more and be toned, strong.
    And I don’t think someone who encourage you to look your best is approving ED. It’s in my opinion giving you reasons for not developing them. Once you look at your arms and you see muscle, believe me you don’t want to loose that muscle (and if you loose much weight you will loose it). Or those nice lines on your stomach, which cannot be seen if you are too thin.
    With that been said, I totally support Cassie, her work, and all those posters out there who work every day to look their best.
    XOXOXO

  6. You are amazing! I absolutely love your energy and enthusiasm! (btw i am posting WAAAY late! haha)

    The others who criticizing you do not know how to look beyond the physical and see people for who they are. They are hurt, have been hurt and want to hurt you. :(

    Hopefully, someday they will realize that people are doing their best at what they do in life and become better human beings.

  7. I think the people who say things like that about you and about Pilates haven’t really taken the time to DO THEIR RESEARCH. It’s not fair to judge someone if you don’t even know them. Having done Pilates for a while with you I can say it’s not some stupid fitness fanatic program on how to get ripped but is more about toning and strengthening your muscles. I think it’s great that you write your posts on a personal level because other people can relate to what your saying. That’s why I love Pilates, because you is an amazing instructor who I feel like is my friend as opposed to trainer. As for the ED’s it’s definitely not fair to say something like that because you have never promoted diets but have only ever promoted eating clean which is hardly an ED. It’s not fair to target other people like that when they’re exposing their feelings because people relate. As for the mirror checking habit, are you kidding I do that AL THE TIME. That’s how I measure my progress, not by standing on the scale but by using ME EYES because I don’t really care about a number it’s my body I want to be happy with, not my weight

  8. Cassey you are wonderful and whoever made you feel bad about yourself is a really awful group of people.

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  10. Rebecca says:

    Hey Cassey, I just wanted to let you know that I am not even jealous of you, as much as I am motivated by you. You push me harder and help me break down those mental barriers. I was Anorexic and Bulimic but I’ve recovered, and I simply want to be healthy, fit, and strong. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to lead an active, healthy life style. It’s just a life choice. Some people are perfectly content with being lazy, and that’s okay too, if that’s what they want for their life. Anyway, I think some people are just extremely insecure (hell, aren’t we all?) and they think there must be something WRONG with you, you being so thin and pretty and all ;). But sometimes us normal, unhealthy human beings over here (including ME!) forget that somethings are unobtainable while others you just have to work really, really hard for.

  11. Never ever stop what you do. You are amazing, Cassey! You inspire me daily, and whenever I’m not feeling well, I turn on one of your videos and I regain my happiness and will to succeed. It is hard to read mean comments, and there will always be nasty people out there. Remember that most of us look up to you, though. I love you!

  12. I know I’m getting here way late, but I haven’t been checking into the blog religiously like I used to so I missed this one. Anyway, Cassey, you’re so sweet. and you are definitely one of my biggest inspirations. I would even go as far as to say that you are one of my heroes. And I only have 4. So that’s a pretty big deal. You inspire me to live every day of my life to the fullest. To eat healthy and keep exercising so I can do the things I love. But you’ve also taught me some very important lessons, one of the biggest being that it’ okay to eat crap every once in awhile! I don’t let it bother me anymore, and you have no idea how freeing that knowledge is. I can enjoy a bowl of greasy potato chips every once in awhile, as long as I don’t let it turn into a binge that ruins everything I’ve ever worked for. Because of you I have pushed myself to accomplish things I never thought possible. You’ve helped me achieve the body I have today, and you’ll help me achieve the one I’m still working for. Your bikini competition made me want the same thing, as well. I don’t want to win– I just want to know if I can do it. You inspired me to get out into the world and just RUN. I hated running for the longest time, but then you changed everything. So no matter what you say or what you do, I will always love you for YOU and for saying what you’re feeling, even if you change your mind later. We’re humans, right? It’s what we do. There will always be someone who will hate you and find something to say, just because they get a sick pleasure from bringing you down. Just always remember that no matter what life throws at you, no matter what anyone says, you have a huge family behind you, and we will always be here.

  13. michelle says:

    hi cassey i know this is a late reply from this blog you wrote but i think you are great and a wonderful person. you have gave me the confidence in myself to achieve my goals in life of being healthy and losing weight gradually . i have already lost 1 stone 5lbs and feeling more confident that i even bought a pair of shorts which i havent wore in 3 years :) . you inspire me and im so thankful you help me and other’s out with your video’s and recipes. thank you!!!

    love your scottish fan michelle :P hehe xxx

  14. Cassey you are great! You are so sweet and genuine, and reading posts like these remind people how you are a human being with a life and with feeling. None of the things these people called you out on are true. In truth, when you’re happy and prosperous like you are now, no matter what, people will try to tear you down. You are beautiful, your hair is awesome, your makeup is radiant, and you glow from the inside out. You are my role model. Just remember, Haters are your motivators.

  15. I just came upon this post and I know its super old and your probably feel way better about it now BUT! I just wanted to add to the cacophony of voices that have replied here to support you. Its awesome to see someone who is managing to steer the treacherous roads of publicity so well and who can respond so warmly even to the voices who try and tear her down. You woman, are the definition of strong starting from within and touching without, and for no other reason I will visit this site for as long as its available. You are totally justified in posting this and Im glad that you have because YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY PERSON WITH SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY!! PEOPLE WHO RESPOND TO YOU NEED TO REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE JUST AS HUMAN AS THEY ARE AND THEIR WORDS CARRY JUST AS MUCH INFLUENCE TO PEOPLE ON THIS SITE AS YOURS DO. I’m impressed by your sense of responsibility to your visitors, its time some of us took some for ourselves as well. keep it up lady, nothing can stop you especially THE HATERS.

    <3 from THE LOVERS

  16. I know I may be late commenting on this post but I just had to say something: For the people who really feel that Cassey is pointing a finger or relaying messages about eating disorders or anything negative, definitely have insecurities with themselves; and you know what, that’s ok, who doesn’t? Cassey is here to help with that and so much more, not to put us down or demean us. What she is doing for us (TOTAL STRANGERS), is giving us hope, laughter, love and a new day! Most people in Cassey’s stand point make people pay for the information she gives everyday. So, if for some odd reason people feel that Cassey is making fun or putting them down, then I think the best way to go about this matter, is to simply say, “Hey Cassey, just to be clear, would you mind explaining to me what you mean…?” instead of attacking her.
    CASSEY, YOU ARE AMAZING AND I’M GLAD THERE ARE GREAT AND WONDERFUL PEOPLE LIKE YOU OUT THERE!!!! KEEP DOING YOUR THING AND I’LL KEEP FOLLOWING!!!!!! ; ) TH!

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